


They Don't Know About Us

by Hannah_Radiant



Category: The Hunger Games (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-29
Updated: 2017-01-29
Packaged: 2018-09-20 13:32:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 45,884
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9493601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hannah_Radiant/pseuds/Hannah_Radiant
Summary: Lavender "Ven" Hartley was finally supposed to be free of the dreaded Reaping Day. She was finally supposed to be able to just go home with her grandmother and just live out the rest of her days working in the mines like her father, and his father before him. She never imagined that she would be reaped for the 69th Hunger Games, it seemed to be impossible her name was only in there seven times. But the fates had a different plan for her, one she would never have wished upon anyone. But she can only hope that her mentor Haymitch Abernathy can stay sober just long enough to help her, and that he can get her the much-needed sponsors to survive long enough. But what she wasn't expecting was connecting with her mentor, finding out that they had far more in common than they would ever care to admit.Eventual Haymitch/OC





	1. Reaping Day

Lavender found it almost painful to get out of bed, she hated Reaping Day. She had lost many of her friends over the years and even if it was her last time being potentially reaped, she was still scared as ever. She turned on her side with a tired yawn before sitting up and stretching her aching muscles.

"Lavender? Time to get up dear." Came the soft voice of her grandmother, Petunia Hartley was a kind woman who had suffered a lot of losses in her life, her daughter-in-law had died in childbirth along with what would have been her only grandson. Her husband had died of illness brought from years of working in the mines, her oldest son was reaped for the games when he was fifteen and her only daughter when she was twelve only a few years later. While her baby, and second son had died a few years ago in a cave in; in the mines. She was no stranger to loss, but that never diminished her inner light, she was what her husband had always called his light in the darkness.

Slowly dragging herself out of bed she walked into the small kitchen where her grandmother was making eggs, she must have traded some of her herbs in her garden for them.

"I ironed a dress for you and hung it on the washroom door for you. So get dressed first, the breakfast is nearly done." She said with a warm smile, Lavender could see the slight fear in her grandmother's eyes, the fear that this could be the year of either tragedy or the year of relief for what was left of the Hartley family. Walking towards the washroom she yawned again, she looked in the old washroom mirror and sighed. She had dark circles under her eyes and it was obvious how tired she was, and how working in the mines for almost a year had already taken its toll on her. One upside she supposed about Reaping Day was she didn't have to go into the mines today. After washing up she pulled on the short sleeve knee-length navy blue dress with off white polka dots that had hung on the door with a tired sigh. This was her last Reaping, if she made it without having her name called then she was free of the fear of ever being reaped. Stepping out of the washroom she walked into the small kitchen where her grandmother was standing in front of the window. She slowly walked up behind her and wrapped her arms around her.

"Don't worry Nana, since I started working in the mines I haven't had to put my name in any more than needed. And after today we will never have to worry again." She whispered in her grandmother's ear as she turned to wrap her arms around her granddaughter.

"Here, let me fix your hair for you." Her grandmother said as she led her to sit down at the kitchen table, her grandmother put her hair in a simple but elegant side bun and pinned it with some clips. "There…" Her grandmother said pausing to look at her granddaughter for a moment.

"Don't worry, today will be just like every other reaping. Like I said I didn't put my name in for any tesserae. So my name is only in there seven times this year. I'll be fine." She said turning in her seat to look at her grandmother with a small smile.

"I hope so. Thankfully it's your last year in that damn bowl." Her eyes went wide at her grandmother's curse but she smiled none the less.

The walk to the Justice Building seemed far too quick than she was hoping; with a quick hug she told her grandmother once more everything was fine. After having checked in with the peacekeepers she walked towards her section. Before getting there a small boy from the Seam accidentally bumped into her. She looked down and smiled weakly, she recognized him as her neighbor Gale Hawthorn. This was only his second reaping and the poor boy was shaking like a leaf.

"Don't worry Gale; your name is only in there twice. How about after this you come with me to the bakery? I was planning on buying a small cake to celebrate my last reaping year." The small boy looked up with wide eyes and smiled before nodding, he was a sweet boy and she imagined he was what her younger brother would have been like if he had lived.

"Really? Can I bring Rory?" He asked, she smiled even more he was protective of his little brother and the two were often joined at the hip.

"You're whole family can come. How's that sound?" The little boy seemed to cheer up at that and ran off to his section with a quick wave. She silently hoped his name wouldn't be called. She stood in her section and looked up towards the stage. She bit back a groan at the sight of the District escort Olympia Luxor. Covered from her wig to her toes in white; even her skin had a painted white tone. She looked like a ghost in that get up. She wanted nothing more than to throw some coal dust at her so she wouldn't be so annoyingly Capitol.

"Hmm…do you think she is the ghost from the Capitol? Coming to haunt us all?" Whispered one of Lavender's former classmates Daphne, a few of the girls in her section giggled quietly.

"Welcome! Welcome! This year is the year of the 69th Hunger Games! Are you all as excited as I am? Now please contain your excitement for a few moments to hear a lovely word from our beloved President Snow!" Olympia said in her squeaky voice, Lavender let out an annoyed groan.

" _Excited_?And they claimed they're the  _civilized_  ones and  _beloved_  President Snow? I think she has lost her mind!" Lavender mumbled under her breath. A few more girls giggled softly. After the short film ended and Olympia began clapping and wiping away her tears. Her actions made many of the people roll their eyes.

"Now! Let us begin the reaping! Let us find out who our lucky tributes will be this year!" She reached her long white-painted talon like nails into the bowl for the girls with a blinding smile. "And the lucky lady this year is…" She opened the paper and cleared her throat.

"LAVENDER HARTLEY!" Lavender froze, she could have sworn Olympia had called out her name, but it had to be a mistake! Her name was only in there seven times! She heard a scream from the section where the families waited and quickly turned around, she saw her grandmother sobbing as she called out her name. "Lavender Hartley? Where are you dearie? Come, come! No need for being shy!" She felt herself beginning to shake in fear; it had to be a mistake!

"Ven! Go. They called you…" Daphne said giving her a nudge which made her stumble a bit. She felt like screaming, she felt like cry but most of all she wanted to run. She couldn't go to the games! She was supposed to finally be home free! She slowly walked through the crowd that parted like she was carrying a plague. She heard sobbing from the boys section and saw poor Gale calling out for her, the boy saw her as an older sister and was smart enough to realize she was most likely going to die. She slowly made her way to the stairs and hoped she could keep some dignity and not fall. Olympia gave her a wide smile and grabbed her arm with an unnecessary and annoy squeal of excitement.

"Now let's find out who the lucky boy will be this year! Congratulations…TOBIAS FLYNN!" She knew Tobias or Toby as he went by. They went to school together; his father was the tailor for District 12. She saw him slowly walk towards the stage with a blank face, except if you looked in his eyes you could see the fear. At Olympia's annoying persistence, they turned towards each other to shake hands.

Peacekeepers ushered her into the Justice Building before she could blink an eye they shoved her into a room with two wooden chairs. She let out a small sob when she saw her grandmother in the doorway. She was sobbing uncontrollably as she latched onto her granddaughter.

"Nana! This can't be happening!" She said with a sob, a Peacekeeper told them they only had two minutes.

"Lavender…I can't lose you! I've lost too many people!" Her grandmother said as she desperately tried to hold her closer than humanly possible. "Take this; I brought it in case...if you…were…." She handed Lavender a small river stone her father had given her as a child, it fit in the palm of her hand and had a hummingbird carved in it. He had given it to her after her mother died.

"Nana I promise I will try my hardest to come back to you. I love you Nana…" The Peacekeeper opened the door and told her time was up. She wasn't expecting anyone else but when the door opened she saw Gale who ran into the room. She quickly wiped away her tears and put on a blank face.

"VEN! They can't make you go!" He called out; she wrapped her arms around the boy and quickly ran her fingers through his hair.

"Promise me you'll be good. Don't cause your parents any trouble when I'm gone. And Gale keep an eye out for my Nana, just stop by every so often and see that she is alright. And no matter what don't ever lose hope." The Peacekeepers came in and pulled Gale away from her, the poor boy was calling out to her when the door closed this time she let the tears she was fighting fall, she felt her legs turn to jelly as she fell to her knees letting out a pained sob. This had to be a sick nightmare; she would wake up soon right? She held the small river stone until it left an imprint in her shaking palm, she couldn't stop shaking and she couldn't stop crying. When the Peacekeepers came they pulled her to her feet and practically dragged her to the vehicle that would take her to the train.

In the vehicle Olympia was smiling like the clueless Capitol idiot everyone thought she was.

"Oh dearie there is no reason to cry! It's an honor to compete in the Hunger Games! Just think of the clothes you will wear! The food you will eat! Such luxuries all at your fingertips!" She said with a grin as they boarded the train, at this point Lavender was beyond fed up, she was past pain and felt nothing but anger.

"SHUT UP! Don't you understand you idiot?! My chances of survival are damn near non-existent! While you sit there with you stupid wigs and  _luxuries_ I'm being put into the games and  _slaughtered_  for  _entertainment_! And my friends and family forced to watch and they will still  _starve_  while you stuff your damn freakish mouths with all of your fancy foods! So sorry I fail to see where it is a fucking  _honor_!" At this Haymitch Abernathy who was borderline comatose from his drinking sat up with a lopsided grin.

"A fighter! You might make it past the bloodbath sweetheart!" She suddenly felt all of her courage leave and she rushed towards the door labeled washroom and threw up what small amount of food she had in her stomach. Her head was pounding from her tears but that didn't stop her from letting out a frustrated scream. She slammed her head back onto the wall and brought her hands up to her face. Picturing her friends and grandmother she knew she had to stop crying, she had to think of how she would make it out of the games, she promised she would try her hardest to at least make it to the final four tributes. Standing up she turned on the water and splashed some cold water on her face before stepping out of the washroom.

"Ven? Hey I know it's probably not much but I swear I will do whatever it takes to get you home. I don't have much waiting for me, my parents…we know that my chances aren't the greatest. Besides that boy…the one who was screaming, he needs you. I have no one like that, and your grandmother she's lost too many people." Toby said as he looked at her from across his seat at the table. She gave him a weak smile as she sat down.

"I can't ask that of you." She said quietly, after letting go of some of her anger and anguish she went right back to being her shy yet nurturing self.

"As our mentor, how do you recommend we stay alive?" Toby asked as he took a small bite of a muffin that was on the table. Haymitch took another swig of his drink and lazily waved his hand in the air as if shooing away a fly.

"Umm…by not getting killed? That seems to work really well." He said before belching, Olympia huffed in disgust.

"Look I get it; you drown yourself in alcohol to forget. But could you at least pretend to care? Can you at least make an effort to help us? Sober up just until we either make it or we both die. I don't care I just don't want to be mentored by a guy who is drunk 24/7! I want to know that there is a possibility that I could make it past the bloodbath, make it longer than a day because my mentor did his job. That he sucked up enough to sponsors to keep me alive for just a little bit longer. I'm not asking you to make me a winner, I am asking you to make me at least keep some of my dignity!" Lavender said as she leaned forward in her chair making sure she held eye contact with Haymitch. "Now tell us what do you want us to do to get sponsors? You want us to be pitiful emotional wreaks? You want us to act like those Career Mutts? Just tell us please." Lavender said softly, she was starting to regret her screaming and crying now that her head was pounding.

"Fine, fell me about yourselves." Haymitch said with a bored sigh, he took one last swig of his drink before putting down the glass.

"There is not much to me. My Dad is the Tailor in the Merchant section. It's just me and my parents. Hobbies…well I like to read and draw I guess. Ven has a more interesting life. People love her too." Toby said as he took a sip of some juice.

"Boring, now what makes you special sweetheart?" Haymitch said with a yawn. When she tried to say nothing Toby cut her off.

"She is a Seam girl; it's just her and her grandmother. But she is like a second mother to half the kids in the district." Toby said with a smile.

"I just work in the mines. Nothing special, and that is an exaggeration." She said quietly, she hated being the center of attention.

"What about that boy, the one who was screaming your name when you were reaped?" She paused a moment to think about Gale, the poor boy who saw her as a friend. Besides his little brother he didn't have many friends.

"Gale, his name is Gale. And I used to watch him and his brother when his mother was working. To keep them out of trouble I mean." She sat there quietly finally deciding to eat something, she slowly reached for a cinnamon muffin. Haymitch sat still a moment he had a look on his face signaling that he was in deep thought.

"The Nurturer and…well we will work on you. If I'm going to be sober you two damn well make it past the bloodbath." Lavender and Toby looked at Haymitch then each other with a small smile and nod.

"Deal." Lavender said with a nod towards Haymitch, who just grunted.


	2. Hell on Heels

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So from this point on I'm just going to put Lavender's nickname "Ven" unless someone specifically calls her by her full name.

Ven was staring out the window in a form of awe; she could see the beginnings of the Capitol district appearing in the window. Compared to District 12 it was massive, and even she couldn't deny its beauty. She felt like she was betraying her District for thinking for a moment that maybe life would have been easier if she was from Capitol, but then she realized if she had been from Capitol then she would be a completely different person. Had she been born in the Capitol she would most likely have been like Olympia, a girl who was willing to paint herself ridiculous colors, wearing wigs and not to mention the crazy clothes. She couldn't help but wonder, if she hadn't been born in District 12, would she still have been as nurturing and family oriented? Or would she have been heartless and selfish?

"Wow, it's pretty amazing isn't?" Ven jumped when she heard Toby beside her, she didn't realize how deep in thought she had been.

"Yeah, sure I guess." Ven said trying to hide the fact that she had been caught off guard, something that could cost her, her life in the Games. Toby seemed to sense she wasn't in much of a talking mood and gave a slight nod and slipped away from her to leave her with her thoughts again. She noticed a reflection behind her and sighed, Haymitch was staring out the window from behind. It seemed like he hadn't noticed she was looking at him.

"It's really ugly there isn't? Once you get a closer look I mean." She said quietly, Haymitch took a step towards the window with a sigh. The two seemed to slip into a comfortable silence for a moment before speaking up.

"Behind the glam is…" He seemed to struggle for words to describe it.

"I'm not going to lie, I'm terrified. I don't want to die Haymitch…I'm still…I'm only eighteen. And the thought of killing someone…I don't want to become a monster…or a murderer. I just want to stay me, and to just continue my life working in the mines like my father and his father before him. And to maybe one day have a family…I just don't know what I want. All I know, is I don't want to die. I don't want to be another forgotten and nameless tribute. Yet, if I win at what cost is it? To be haunted by the Games. I've seen the Victors…I've seen what it's done to them and you. You may put on an act that it doesn't bother you…but your eyes, they don't lie. The pain…and the torture and the never-ending cycle where you have to go  _back_ every year and attempt to help new tributes live when you are still struggling yourself." He looked at her with slight surprise at her words yet at the same time he seemed almost relieved at her insight.

"And that is why you have potential. You see past the bullshit of the Games. I promise I will try to get you as many sponsors as possible. But you have to make them love you. Get them to eat out of the palm of your hand. And if you really mean what you said, don't let them change you." He said as the train pulled into the station. She could hear Capitol citizens screaming her name, and even a few were screaming that they  _loved_  her. To be honest it disturbed her, these people shouldn't even know her name.

As she stepped off the train she felt a wave of nausea people were trying to grab her and they kept calling her name. Toby however was encouraging the attention, from the people calling his name. The two were then led towards a building labeled remake building, which made the two tributes from District 12 look at each other in confusion for a moment. Toby was then grabbed by what Ven assumed was a woman with bubble gum pink hair that went to her waist in tight ringlets and she herself was then grabbed by a man with dark hair and a dark purple velvet jacket and leather pants, he seemed relatively normal except for his almond-shaped cat eyes. She wanted to resist but figured that it would be pointless.

"Alright dearie strip down and put this on." The man said handing her a silk robe, Ven's eyes went wide the thought of stripping in front of a stranger was awkward enough, not to mention the one asking her to do so was a man.

"W-what?" She asked as she stared at the man who was tapping his foot impatiently.

"Honey, please you aren't my type. Which is why I'm here and not with your fellow tribute. The name is Augustus. And your stylist will be here soon, until then I need to get you prepped. Which means washing off all of that…what is that coal dust? And if needed waxing, let me tell you some of the past girls I could have sworn they were baboons with how much hair they had on their legs! Ew!" Ven gave him a weird look at his words and shook it off as Capitol being ignorant of how fashion is not important in the lower districts. With shaky hands she reached the buttons of her dress to change into the robe. It was at this moment Augustus realized how awkward it was for her.

"Tell you what; I'll step over here for a moment. The stuff to wash with is over there. When you are all done just call me. Best way to make it the so-called Capitol clean you should scrub at least a layer of skin off, at least that's what they do to the poor tributes from other districts." She was actually surprised by his offer and smiled at him with a relieved sigh. She looked at all the scented soap and shampoos and sighed, she decided on the sandalwood scent. After she scrubbed herself and rinsed she quickly put on the robe.

"U-um…Augustus? I'm finished?" He quickly came in with a smile and waved a hand towards a table signaling her to lie down. She felt exposed laying on the table as he inspected her muttering to himself.

"Hmm…it looks like you have actually heard of a razor. Makes my job easier, but I'll still do a touch up by waxing alright?" She just nodded wanting the process to be over. "So tell me what's it like living in District 12? It must have been nice having close family like you do there. I've never seen anything beyond Capitol. And I rarely see my family to be honest." He seemed genuinely curious. And she was a little surprised that he mentioned that to her.

"I suppose…" When he noticed she didn't feel like talking he gave her a sympathetic nod. After he had brushed out her hair for her he looked up at the door with a smile. A woman with short blonde hair and a hint of pink in it stood in the doorway.

"Gus, you better not be causing problems. By the way, thought you'd want to know Odair is here. If you hurry you might get a quick look. Now let me do my job and scram." Augustus let out a howl of laughter before walking towards the door and giving the woman a quick kiss on the cheek.

"Love you bitch! And don't worry you're in good hands here." Augustus said with a laugh and a wink towards Ven before leaving the room.

"Sorry about the spaz. I'm your stylist Nova. I'm supposed to make you desired by all of Capitol and Panem. But I don't want to just make you desirable I want you to be remembered for more than just your body like they do for other districts. We aren't going to put you in revealing clothes because anyone can look desirable that way. We are going to put you in clothes your grandmother won't kill me for. Now let's make those Career bitches jealous what do you say?" At this Ven was a little surprised, and found herself chuckling.

Nova had put Ven in a beautiful black gown with a tiered ruffled skirt; the bodice was a strapless corset like with a sweetheart neckline on it was hand sewn gold embellishments. She couldn't believe how beautiful she felt in the dress. She had on simple black heels that made her small 5'3 frame at least 5'6.

"Now for your hair, it won't be too fancy because you'll have a hat." Nova said with a smile as curled Ven's hair making it in perfect waves and pinned it in a side bun with some strands loose in the front. For her make-up she did a black and grey smoky eye with a peachy pink lip color and for her nails she painted them black. "Perfect, those Careers don't stand with getting sponsors to love them with you looking like that." Nova said with a smirk as she helped Ven up. She turned to hand her a miner's helmet with a wink." Ven raised her eyebrow at the helmet surely her stylist was joking right?

"You want me to wear a miner's helmet?" She asked hesitantly her stylist just chuckled.

"It has a strobe light, figured you guys from District 12 would have fun giving the crazies of Capitol and the Careers migraines." Ven outright laughed at that something told her she would get along really well with her stylist.

"I think I love your foul little mind." Ven said as the two began laughing even harder, she was now positive they could become great friends.

"Now let's go before your laughter tears wash away your makeup. " Nova said as she led Ven out to where the chariots were. Ven looked at the horses with wide eyes; they were far larger than she ever imagined them to be. She walked up to the horse for her district and tilted her head in curiosity as she reached a hand out to pet the large black horse.

"Strange aren't they?" She quickly spun around to see Haymitch drinking from a flask. "Don't worry it's just apple juice with carbonated water. I'm still sober." She gave him a smile. "And by the way what's with the helmet? The rest looks…you look…" Her smile grew as she laughed she watched him stumble for words.

"Thank you. And it has a strobe light to as my stylist said to give migraines to the Capitol crazies and the Careers." After a moment he grinned and let out a howl of laughter. She joined him in his laughter which caused several people to look over at them in confusion. Haymitch gave her a wink before helping her onto the chariot. She smiled at him as she attempted to hide her blush, even though he was nineteen years older than her she wasn't going to lie, Haymitch Abernathy was still an attractive man, haunted by the games but still handsome.

"Just remember to breathe, crazy fact about breathing it's been proven it helps keep you alive, at least through the damn parade. And don't worry unlike the poor District One tributes you have actual clothes on. From what I hear they are only covered with only rhinestones and sequins." Ven's eyes went wide before she gave an awkward laugh. With one last lopsided smile he nodded to Toby who walked over to them and climbed onto the chariot. Toby wore a suit that matched Ven's dress and he had a matching helmet too.

"Good luck you two, and make sure you give them one hell of a migraine." Haymitch said with a chuckle as he walked off.

"You ready for this?" Toby asked with a sigh, Ven could only shake her head. She hated large crowds and she was about to be thrown out into one of the largest crowds in all of Panem.

"Alright you two, when you are ready then hit the button on your helmets to turn on the light. Give 'em hell you two!" Nova said with a wink before the chariot began moving. The two couldn't help but gasp a little at the bright lights and the cheers of people from the Capitol it was overwhelming.

"I have an idea, they want a show? Let's give them a show." Toby said with a smile, he held out his hand for her to take and she smiled at him with a quick nod. Once they joined hands they both turned on their helmets. The bulb moved up towards the sky and immediately turned into a spot light, the spot light moved around grabbing attention from the people before flickering like a strobe light it moved around drawing the attention, of everyone who looked at them with curiosity. It even attracted the curiosity, of a few tributes.

"Nova is a genius!" Toby said with a laugh as he saw some of the Capitol citizens scream in excitement and reach out towards them as if they were the most valuable thing in all of Panem.

"Nova, have I told you that you are a genius yet tonight?" Haymitch asked with a smirk as he saw people immediately turn to look at his tributes completely ignoring the others.

"Nope, but please do continue to remind me Abernathy." The Stylist said with a laugh as she sipped her glass of whiskey. "I can't help it that I'm original and I don't dress tributes in the same costume every year. And hey, you've got company." She said nodding behind Haymitch. He turned to see a few men and women from Capitol with eager smiles.

"Mr. Abernathy? That exquisite female tribute of yours, I wish to sponsor her! I MUST!" Said a man with blue skin and hair, Haymitch gave a smile, but on the inside he wanted to hurl. He knew what men like him wanted with tributes; they weren't looking to sponsor but to hopefully spend the night with her. Many previous victors were sadly in that position. After a few more potential sponsors approached him and left he sighed, he hated dealing with the sponsors, having to beg them to notice his tributes and save them, and then damn them the life of a victor if by chance they survived the games.

"What's got you in la-la land Abernathy?" Haymitch tilted his head back in his seat and noticed a few of his fellow victors and sort of friends of his standing behind him, the one who spoke up was Finnick Odair, an eighteen year old who was the victor four years ago.

"Just dreaming about life away from Capitol, you know the grand life of the Victors." Haymitch said with a smirk, there was a booming laugh from behind him coming from Chaff one of Haymitch's drinking buddies, well he supposed it would be former really soon.

The Parade had finished and the Victors all headed to the elevators to meet up with their tributes. Ven immediately saw Haymitch and smiled before having Toby, help her walk over, she still wasn't used to heels and her feet were killing her.

"Not bad you two, not bad at all." Haymitch said as he offered an arm to Ven who was still having trouble in her heels. The three of them entered the elevator and were then joined by the two tributes from District 4 and their mentors Mags and Finnick Odair. The second the doors closed Ven bent down to take off her heels with a satisfied sigh, she threw them into the corner of the elevator much to the amusement, of the people in the elevator with them.

"What? You've never had to wear those damn things! If the games don't kill me then the high heels will." She said as she leaned against the back wall and slid to the floor with a yawn.

"Then I suppose I should be grateful I'm naturally tall?" Finnick Odair said with a flirtatious smile and wink, much to his surprise Ven just blinked at him once before shrugging.

"I suppose so. But I like being 5'3; it is average height and good enough for me." She said closing her eyes. She only opened them when she heard someone slide down onto the floor next to her, turning to her left she saw the boy from District 4 smiling at her.

"Hi, I'm Logan." He said with his own flirtatious smile, Ven just laughed in his face as she shook her head.

"What is with the guys in District 4 thinking they are a gift to all women? So just spare me the flirting please." Her response made Mags and Haymitch burst into a fit of laughter and Toby began to chuckle.

"Haymitch, I like her. I like her a lot." Finnick said with a grin. The elevator gave a ding and the tributes and mentors from District 4 walked out to their floor. She couldn't help but smile tonight was definitely an interesting night. She found herself humming an old song she remembered her mother singing to her as a child and smiled to herself, she remembered her mother used to always come up with crazy ideas she had about Capitol and what she thought it was like. If only her mother were here to see it, to tell Ven that she was going to be alright if only she was still alive for Ven to tell her all about her time in Capitol. When they reached their floor the elevator made a ding and the doors slid open, Toby immediately rushed out of the elevator to look around the penthouse. It was Haymitch who held out a hand to help her up, she wasn't expecting him to have much strength as he did so when he did pull her up she stumbled a bit into his arms. The two looked at each other a moment, she found him to be intoxicating, it seemed like hours not the few seconds it had been before Toby called out to her from the other room.

"VEN, YOU HAVE GOT TO SEE THIS VIEW!" The two jumped apart as if they had been lit on fire. She quickly grabbed the shoes she had thrown on the floor and walked out of the elevator with a blush, she had to get a grip, in no way was it smart to fall for Haymitch Abernathy. For starters he was her mentor for the Hunger Games, and chances were she was going to die. And secondly it wasn't the brightest idea to be with a Victor not when Capitol practically owned them; she knew she could be used as a manipulation tool if the Capitol saw it fit.

She walked into the open spaced penthouse and looked around in awe she had a feeling that she could fit at least ten of her house in one room alone. She had to agree with Toby, the view of the Capitol from the penthouse was the most amazing thing she had seen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys like this chapter, it's kind of just a filler and an introduction to Nova. Let me know if you want to see more of Augustus, I can keep having him make an appearance. And if you want more Finnick, Mags or Chaff let me know.  
> I will point out though if you want a Victor to make an appearance it has to be a Victor from BEFORE the 69th Hunger Games. So those with names at this point are: Mags, Woof, Lyme, Seeder, Beetee, Wiress, Blight, Chaff, Brutus, (obviously) Haymitch, Enobaria, Gloss, Cashmere and Finnick.


	3. Training Sessions

Ven never thought she would be so confused with a bathroom layout, yet alone a shower in Capitol. There had to be a million buttons on the shower and she was too tired to try everyone. She let out a frustrated scream all she wanted was a hot shower. She decided to close her eyes and press a random button which when she opened her eyes dispensed a rose scented gel. She immediately gagged; she wasn't a fan of roses. After pressing at least ten other buttons she gave up she figured it would be best to ask someone for help. She quickly ran out of the bathroom to find someone who could help. She noticed an Avox in the corner of the room and smiled at the girl before approaching her.

"Umm…hi, I was wondering if you could help me. I don't know how…wow this is embarrassing but the shower? Could you maybe help?" She asked with an embarrassed laugh, the Avox nodded before following her to the bathroom. The Avox pointed to one of the buttons and then pointed to her nose.

"That controls the scents?" Ven asked the Avox girl nodded and pointed to Ven as if to ask what she wanted to the scent to be. "Umm…is there sandalwood or a gardenia scent?" The Avox girl once again nodded and pointed to a button before she acted out scrubbing her arm. Then the girl pointed to another button and then pointed at her hair. Ven smiled at the girl and thanked her for her help. The girl gave a small smile of her own. After her shower Ven changed into the outfit she was supposed to wear to training, she still had a few hours before training sessions started but she didn't want to have to change later. This year they had the training outfit consisted of a black short sleeve shirt with the district logo on the front, it was made from a stretchy material and the pants were a light grey capris.

"Hey, umm do you think we could just hang out? I mean I know you aren't supposed to but…I could really use a friend that I don't have to expect anything from." The girl looked around as if she was nervous, but she could also tell the girl wanted to hang out with someone too. Ven held up a finger and ran to her room grabbing a notepad and a pen she gave it to the girl with a smile. The girl took the notepad and pen with a smile of her own.

 _Leto_ , the girl wrote on the notepad before pointing to herself and then placing her index finger to her lips as if to shush her.

"You name is Leto? I'm Ven, nice to meet you Leto." She said with a smile.

A few hours went by and it was time for the first breakfast in Capitol, the first person to come down was Haymitch who looked as if he hadn't gotten any sleep at all.

"Morning Haymitch." Ven said with a warm smile, she felt bad that he couldn't get a decent night's sleep, then again what victor could? He looked at her and Leto with furrowed brows.

"This is Leto." Ven said, she noticed that Leto was rather nervous at the sight of Haymitch and she realized that technically Leto wasn't allowed to communicate with  _anyone_ especially a tribute. "Don't worry; I was just desperate to…communicate with someone. And she was the only one awake." Ven said with a nervous smile.

"Look it's against the rules, you two could get into serious trouble. No offense but she is an Avox for a reason, she pissed someone off in Capitol and was punished." Haymitch said with a sigh as he sat down.

"Yeah for speaking out against the games, which everyone in the districts does, so why can't a Capitol citizen do the same? Y'know what I don't care, if I'm to die in the arena I at least want to know that I had people to talk to that actually matter. Way I see it she is basically in the same situation." Ven said as she sat down at the table for breakfast which another Avox brought out.

"I just don't want to see you get hurt, in either the games or out of them." Haymitch said with a sigh as he took a bite of some eggs. Before either of them could say something else both Olympia and Toby walked into the room and sat down.

"Alright look today is the first day of training. What are you two good at?" Haymitch asked looking at Ven and Toby. Ven couldn't really think of what exactly she was good at, she always saw herself as just average. And she didn't exactly know much about Toby other than he was from the Merchant Square and his father was the district tailor.

"Umm…I don't know? I mean my best quality is that I'm friendly, though I doubt that will help me." Ven said before looking at Toby wondering what he would say he was good at.

"How about your talent with first aid? I've seen you patch up  _tons_  of people in the district. And it was you that set my friend's arm when he broke it. It's good as new and there is no sign he ever broke it." Toby said leaning forward, Ven's eyes went wide she never thought about when she patched people up she just did it and she sure as hell wasn't as good as he said.

"I'm not as good as Mrs. Everdeen; she is the best at first aid. My first aid is really simple…" She tried to make Toby realize she wasn't as good as he thought; she was average just plain average.

" _Modesty_ , we both know you are being modest. It's  _me_  that is talent-less. Unless the games this year are to find the best tailor, I'm screwed." Ven rolled her eyes, she wanted nothing more than to go home and just live her life. She took a sip of her glass of milk with a sigh.

"You two will not, I repeat will  _not_  show them your talents. Make them think you are weak and pathetic. It's done wonders in the past for other tributes. Take the training sessions as a time for observing, and if you want to make, an alliance that's the time." Haymitch said as he stood up ready to lead them to the training session.

Once in the training center Ven looked around there were tributes gathered around to hear what the trainers had to say before they could branch out into the different stations.

"In two weeks, 23 of you will be dead. One of you will be alive. Who that is depends on how well you pay attention over the next four days, particularly to what I'm about to say. First, no fighting with the other tributes, you'll have plenty of time for that in the Arena. Second, not all of you will die in the bloodbath. So take the time to learn basic survival methods. These basic survival methods could save your life. There are four compulsory exercises, and then rest will be individual training. My advice is  _again_ , don't ignore the survival skills. Everybody wants to grab a sword, but most of you will die from natural causes: 10% from infection, 20% from dehydration. Exposure can kill as easily as a knife. I know many of you wish to just find a weapon and fight, but the best tactic is basic survival. Now you are free to find a station to train, but remember  _no fighting_  with other tributes. And may the odds be ever in your favor!" The head of the trainers Atala said as she waved off the tributes.

Ven walked over to the knot tying station and looked at the screen; there were over a dozen different knots to learn or practice for those that already knew them. She was in the process of tying a slip knot a small girl with blonde hair slid up next to her quietly.

"Hi, I'm Lux. I'm from District 3. My mentors told me to make an alliance…and you seem less…" The girl looked around hesitantly and visibly shaking when she saw a girl from District 1, throw a knife at a dummy and hit it right where the heart would be if it were alive.

"I can't guarantee an alliance, with me can keep you alive. And to be honest I don't really plan on making any alliances." She said not bothering to look at the girl, the less people she got attached to the less painful the games would be. The girl nodded and slipped away to one of the other stations. Ven felt a little bad but she didn't want to get attached to anyone since they were going into the games.

"Wow that was kinda  _harsh_  the poor girl just wanted an ally." Ven rolled her eyes at the voice it was Logan from District 4. She was getting rather annoyed by him constantly finding her. Once she finished her knot she walked away to avoid him, there was no way she would be around a Career any longer than absolutely necessary. Ven looked around to see all of the different training stations and silently observed everyone.

"I feel pathetic, I know Haymitch said to hide our talents…but we have to do  _something_  right?" Toby said as he walked up to Ven.

"Maybe, if we just did basic survival skills." She said with a shrug. The two walked over to the fire-making station and got to work. "I'll watch the Careers and tributes up to District 6, you watch the rest. Learn their strengths and weaknesses. We will write them down when we get back. I've already noticed the male tribute from District 1 favors his right side; he has trouble with using his left side. He seems to stumble at the unfamiliarity. And the girl, she seems to have poor upper body strength she failed earlier with the tree climbing and ropes stations." Ven said never looking up from her task at making a fire.

"The guy from District 11 relies heavily on brute strength, he lacks in endurance and swiftness. The girl however is great at climbing she has been observing us for a while now from up above. The two from District 7 favor axes naturally, and seem to struggle with any other weapon. So if we can keep those from them we'd have an advantage. However I don't want to take chances with a pick-axe either, it would be similar enough to be lethal." Toby whispered so the girl from District 11 couldn't hear them. Ven gave a subtle nod as the first sparks of a fire appeared.

"Odair is most likely going to train his male tribute with a trident. So I think you should watch his games and learn it. Practice in private sessions. Gloss and Cashmere will most likely train their tributes with knives which was Cashmere's specialty. District 3 will most likely use electric traps, so keep an eye out for those." She said quietly, Toby sniffed once to let her know he heard her as he continued to look around discreetly. After the two both successfully made two fires each they moved to the next station. The station they chose was the edible plants and bugs which were side by side. After a few minutes at this station they heard music start to play, they turned around to see the boy from District 3 had hot-wired one of the stations and managed to make it play music like a radio. Many of the other tributes also were looking at the boy with curiosity others looked at him with annoyance.

"Sorry…the quiet was driving me insane." He said as he looked around a bit nervously. Everyone looked up to look at the Gamemakers, to their surprise the head Gamemaker Antigonus Archon was smiling.

"Why not leave the music playing? A little simple pleasure never hurt. And I do  _love_  this song!" He said with a grin that made his blue eyes sparkle mischievously. Ven was one of the tributes to smile at the man; a few others went back to what they were doing after giving the boy from District 3 one last glare. It was a song Ven had heard in her room the night before; she had come to love the radio in her room that played music. She never had such a selection, of music before coming here, before in her district she would just sing songs known in the district alone. She soon found herself singing along softly to herself, not noticing that both Toby but the small girl from District 11 who had followed them from above were both listening to her sing.

" _Oh blame it on the radio, the radio; I blame it on the radio. I never thought that you would let me go. And still have hold through the audio, it always plays the wrong songs and I can't seem to turn off. Oh the radio, I thought the open road would, Drive you outta my mind. They're telling our story in every line, I can't stop. I know it's wrong. I turn it up and sing along, I'll never get over you. You're ringing out in every tune_ " She sang with a smile as she worked, she loved to sing when she worked it made it go by quicker.

"You have a beautiful voice." Ven jumped a little before looking up noticing the girl had followed. The small girl had unruly curly hair and dark brown eyes that shone with an innocence that did not belong in the games. Ven remembered that the girl was only 13. When she watched the reruns of the Reaping she remembered this small girl had several younger siblings who cried for her.

"Thank you." She said quietly as she quickly looked back down at her work, she reminded herself not to get close to anyone. She was already in too deep forming a friendship with Toby. A buzzer went off signaling that the train sessions were finished for the day, Ven stood up and helped Toby as they made their way back to the elevator. The doors opened and Haymitch was waiting for them with a blank face once again District 4 was in the elevator with them along with the two from District 3. Ven looked at the mentors and noticed Finnick Odair wasn't there today it was only Mags. She then looked at the two mentors for District 3, Beetee Latier from the 35th Games and Wiress from the 38th Games. The two were known for their skills with electricity meaning their tributes were most likely trained in that as well.

Even though Ven hadn't done much during training it was overwhelming, the training center just made the, reality of being a tribute sink in much more. Toby seemed to agree and often stared off into nothingness as he wrote down his observations for the first day.

"Which games do you want to watch first?" Toby asked as he looked at the recordings permanently saved for future tributes.

"I know Mags from District 4 could make fishhooks out of anything and lived off of non-poisonous nuts. And everyone knows how Odair won his games. As for Cashmere of District 1 like I mentioned before she was skilled with knives. I pretty much have seen the all but…" She paused and Toby understood, the only games, she wasn't familiar with was Haymitch's games. The two looked at each other and realized that neither of them had actually watched the 50th Hunger Games. They knew about the others from stories and the more recent ones they knew of from watching them personally. But how their mentor won was somewhat of a mystery to them.

"Shouldn't we see if it's alright with him to watch his games? I mean what if he doesn't want us to see it?" Ven asked hesitantly as she watched Toby aim the remote towards the screen about to put the games on.

"He'd want us to prepare for the games wouldn't he?" Ven couldn't help but feel awkward, sure he would want them to prepare but she didn't know if he'd want them to watch  _his_ games. Toby had against Ven's protests put on the games which started with the reaping, the year Haymitch was reaped had been a Quarter Quell and that year  _four_  tributes from each district had been reaped. She felt her heartbreak when a girl named Maysilee Donner was reaped. The blonde girl was the sister of the mayor's wife. She remembered hearing about the poor girl who would never return.

When Haymitch was called a younger boy called out in terror much like Gale had for her, she realized that it had to be Haymitch's younger brother. But the most heart retching scream came from his mother, she couldn't contain her screams as she fell to the ground sobbing. She noticed there was a girl in the sixteen-year olds' section crying she assumed it had to be a girlfriend or a friend. Ven couldn't help but stare at the younger version of her mentor, he was tall and slender but he was very attractive. His hair was a bit darker, shorter too and it was a bit messy, but it suited him just fine just like his stubble that was just starting to grow. His eyes were the same blue. However his eyes seemed to have a mischievous twinkle even when he was frowning, instead of a dull and haunted look that they had now.

The screen then skipped to the parade where Haymitch was dressed as a miner and the girl Maysilee was dressed as what Ven assumed to be a canary. The screen then skipped to the interviews, Maysilee was friendly and had an aura of innocence. Haymitch however came off as almost a troublemaker.

"So Mr. Abernathy, what do you think about the games having twice as many tributes this year?" Caesar Flickerman asked. Haymitch was resting one arm on the back of the chair he sat in and had his right foot resting on his left knee. He scratched his nose with his other hand as he gave a sarcastic laugh.

"I don't see much of a difference, they are going to be just as stupid." He said with a smirk.

"How did you feel when your name was called as one of the male tributes?" Caesar asked this time leaning towards Haymitch a bit.

"I felt like  _shit_. My name was called how was I  _supposed_  to feel, but I guess I'll just have to deal with it won't I?" He said making his mischievous eyes sparkle, he threw a smirk to the audience who laughed.

"Tell me about yourself, I'm sure Panem is  _dying_  to know more about you!" The interviewer said with a toothy grin.

"Oh wow, I didn't realize Panem was competing in the games this year too. Sure is gonna be crowed in the arena! But hmm let's see my name is obviously Haymitch Abernathy, I'm sixteen and oh I'm from District 12. I like long walks in the Seam...what more can I say?" The audience all laughed again at his smartass responses. His personality was the kind that could get anyone to love him; he was alluring and could work the audience while still hiding what he was really thinking.

The screen once again changed to a different scene, this time it was the arena. During the bloodbath many tributes were in awe of the beauty of the arena and were too stunned to get off of their pedestals early, Haymitch however used this to his advantage and managed to grab both a knife and a backpack of his choosing. At some point he came across three Careers and he managed to take out two of them with his knife, but the last one got to him first and was about to slit his throat. Maysilee came running to his aid and killed the Career with a poisoned dart. It showed Haymitch making, an alliance with Maysilee after she saved him from the Career. After it got down to the final five the two went their separate ways.

Haymitch had kicked a pebble off the edge of the cliff he stood on and it bounced back, he realized that there was a force field. He threw the pebble this time and once again it bounced off and landed where he found it. He laughed at his discovery, pleased that he had found out about the force field. Something told Ven that it whatever was going to happen next would not be a pleasant, she was right when she heard Maysilee scream as she was attacked by large candy-pink birds. Ven felt sick as she jumped up from her seat.

"STOP! TURN IT OFF!" She screamed she couldn't watch as Haymitch held the dying girl's hand as she died. She wanted to run but she was frozen, she was too terrified to move it was like a train wreak and she wanted to claw her eyes out for watching.

"Ven…" Toby reached for her which made her scream as she shoved his hand away. Her screaming caught the attention, of present time's Haymitch who came running in only to freeze when he saw the games he played in on the screen, he looked a mix between furious, haunted and sympathetic to Ven who had fallen to her knees screaming as she covered her ears. He ran to the girl and held onto her shoulders.

"Turn that  _damn_  thing  _off_!" He snarled at Toby as he tried to calm Ven down, she couldn't stop sobbing.

"I don't want to die! I don't want to die!  _Please_  don't let them kill me!" She said looking into her mentor's eyes, she cried even harder when she noticed he had unshed tears in his own eyes.

"Ven, sweetheart you need to calm down. It's alright…I promise you right now you are safe. And in the games I will do whatever it takes to keep you safe sweetheart. Just please calm down." He said as he wiped her tears, she was slowly calming down but she couldn't get the sight of the younger Haymitch comforting the dying Maysilee Donner. Each day that went by just made her even more terrified, how could the people of Capitol not see what they were doing to her and the other tributes was wrong and  _beyond_  traumatic? She realized long ago however that to the Capitol they were nothing but a source of entertainment, she was willing to bet the second a citizen of the Capitol would be reaped they would cause a riot. Yet they expected the districts to bite their tongues or end up destroyed like District 13 was. And there was nothing fair about that at all, which is why she grew to hate the Capitol and its never-ending masquerade.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow SEVEN pages and 3,977 words! And I'm posting the next chapter after my class today! I must seriously love you guys, which perhaps you could show the appreciation too by REVIEWING! I get tons of favorites and follows but not many reviews anymore, it wouldn't kill you to review I promise!  
> Now for an FYI I have a polyvore collection for the characters and I need help with names and fates in the games. I don't want to focus too much on the games since I plan to make it more about AFTER the games, so they will be maybe one or two chapters only. There are some SPOILERS in the collection but not too big.  
> polyvore.com/possible_69th_hunger_games/collection?id=3492849


	4. Come As You Are

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I had posted this chapter on my Fanfiction.net page an anonymous reviewer had made a rude comment about the song choice I had for this chapter. BUT I also wanted to address the very rude review from someone who obviously wanted to remain anonymous; I chose the “Cup Song” because I felt that it could have been one of the songs that had been passed down through the generations before the rebellion. It was ORIGINALLY written in 1931 which was around the time of THE GREAT DEPRESSION. I felt that it would fit for the historical similarities of those living in the “Hoovervilles” and District 12. And they felt the need to point out that no one in District 12 has ever been on a train unless they were reaped, yes it is true they wouldn’t have been on a train unless reaped but who said the song is about trains? No one. 
> 
> And I chose one of the modern takes on it because it was more the type of singing voice I imagine for my character.

It was the day of her private session with the Gamemakers, she was beyond nervous at this point. It was a known fact the by the time the lower districts went to demonstrate their strengths the Gamemakers had lost interest and usually did not pay them much attention. But she knew she had to prove that she was worth watching. She however also knew that she wasn't much of a fighter; she was always more of a healer type. Time seemed to of slowed down to almost a complete stop as she waited.

"Flynn, Tobias, District 12." The woman who was calling back the tributes for their private session called. Toby stood up and gave Ven one last smile before walking towards the entrance.

"Good luck Toby!" She called as he turned his head to give her a quick thank you. After a few more minutes she was finally called back. Toby gave her a quick good luck as she passed him. The Gamemakers appeared to be more interested in their food than her.

"Lavender Hartley…District 12…." She said as she looked up at them, none of them paid attention to her. She cleared her throat and tried again but louder. "LAVENDER HARTLEY, DISTRICT 12!" This time one of the Gamemakers heard her and turned to look at her.

"You have ten minutes to show us your skills." A man said with a wave of his hand. She looked at what they had set up for tributes and decided to show them her skills with first aid and knots. However the Gamemakers didn't seem at all entertained or interested in these skills. Looking at the weapons rack she noticed several weapons from knives to spears, and a bow to a trident. She had practiced a bit with each of them during her sessions with Haymitch but beyond twirling the trident she was horrible at it. She did however notice a pick-ax; she  _did_ know how to use one of those. She swung it at one of the dummies pretending it was a wall in the mines. With a loud  _thunk_  the pick-ax embedded itself into the dummy. From its positioning and judging how deep it was she knew if the dummy was an actual person the blow would have been fatal. She pulled the pick-ax out with ease, there was a large gaping hole in the dummy's chest, and it was, indeed a fatal blow. She looked up at the Gamemakers when she heard a gasp; they were staring at her with wide eyes amazed that a girl of her size had such strength. She put the pick-ax back where she found it and gave them a nod as she thanked them for their time and turned to leave.

That night Ven was sitting on the couch with Toby waiting for the results of their scores. She was nervous if she got too poor a score she might not have many sponsors, yet with a high score she was a high priority target in the arena. The two tributes from District 1 both got nines; from District 2 they both got a ten. Ven zoned out for the rest of the tributes until they announced District 12.

"And for Tobias Flynn of District 12: a score of an eight! And for Lavender Hartley the female tribute…oh my, this is quite unexpected! A score of TEN! This is not a common feat for District 12, last time we had a score so high was during the Quell!" Caesar said with a huge grin, Ven's eyes went wide at her score everyone in the room cheered as they jumped to their feet.

"Not bad sweetheart, not bad at all!" Haymitch said with a lopsided grin, she knew that Caesar had, been talking about Haymitch for the previous score of a ten.

Today was the day of interviews and saying the Ven wasn't nervous would have been a tremendous lie. She was shaking like a leaf and with the gold platform heels Nova had her wear it could be dangerous. She tried to pull her dress down a bit further to cover more of her slender legs, but the form-fitting black dress refused to go much, further than her knee. She looked in her mirror and sighed it was a beautiful dress, but on her she felt uncomfortable, so unlike herself. The sleeveless dress reached just about her knees and was form-fitting with shimmering gold piping fashioned into a crossover design with a keyhole accent in the front of the bodice. Nova had given her a leather bracelet with gold ball like beads surrounding a crystal ball in the center and dangling earrings made with gun-metal and gold-plated with brass, with sun and moon symbols that dangled underneath pyrite. She also wore simple gold studs, since her first week Nova had convinced her to pierce her ears once more in her right ear lobe and twice more in her left ear lobe as well as her left cartilage, she was actually rather fond of the piercings for it was different and sometimes she rather enjoyed different and she figured she should have a little fun before the games in, case she didn't make it. Which is why she also secretly had gotten a tattoo with Nova, who was a horrible influence but she loved the woman none the less. Her tattoo was on her left side under her bra line, it read  _Aut viam Inveniam Aut Facium_  which meant I shall either find a way or make one. Above and below the words were vines with leaves and subtle floral designs. When she got it Nova had told her that it would be their little secret which the two laughed about. If her grandmother ever saw it she was sure she would smack her upside her head and give her a lecture.

"Ven, you ready to get this over with?" Nova asked as she finished her hair and makeup. For her makeup Nova gave her gold eye shadow with black in the outer corners with full yet not too dramatic false lashes and a clear gloss on her lips. She then painted Ven's nails back and put two gold lines on making a t on each nail. Her hair was in a very simple but elegant twist with a few strands framing her face; she was barely recognizable from the girl who was usually covered from head to toe with coal from the mines she worked in. But she felt beautiful, she felt for one of the rare times in her life-like an actual woman and not just a miner.

"I suppose, let's just get this over with." She said with a sigh as she made her way out of her room. Toby was standing by the elevator door in a suit similar to hers with gold piping on the lapels of his jacket. It wasn't Toby that caught her attention, it was Haymitch who was looking at her as if she was the only person in the room, and she fought a blush as she slowly made her way towards the two. She was still not used to walking in heels and stumbled a bit; with reflexes she didn't know he still had Haymitch had made his way across the room in a heartbeat to catch her before she fell. She looked into his blue-grey eyes with her large doe like eyes before whispering a thank you.

"Still haven't mastered heels yet I see?" He whispered as he helped her stand, wrapping his arm into hers he slowly helped her walk to the elevator with a soft smile.

"Ven, remember sway your hips a bit. It makes walking in heels a little easier." Nova said with a wink, she had guessed that Ven had a slight crush on her mentor a few days ago and occasionally dropped hints to the girl much to her embarrassment.

"Nova, leave the poor girl alone! We are trying to pass her off as sexy, not some blushing little girl!" Augustus said with a laugh as he joined them in the elevator.

The elevator ride seemed to take forever and it didn't help that the Tributes from District 3, 4 and 11 had joined them. Ven hated being in the elevator with so many people it was claustrophobic and she somehow always managed to be the one crammed into the corner.

"Relax sweetheart, just focus on the music playing." Haymitch whispered when he noticed she was tightly gripping her river stone, she could feel the hummingbird carving leaving an imprint in her hand again. With as often as she held the stone she was beginning to think she would permanently have a hummingbird imprint on her hand. She took his advice and listened to the music playing and softly humming to herself to calm down, but much like a real hummingbird her heart was pounding a million beats a minute, at least it felt like that to her. When they finally reached the floor they were getting off at, she couldn't stop shaking, she was sure that the other tributes had observed her shaking like a leaf, but she couldn't help it. She was about to be interviewed not only in front of hundreds of people but broadcast-ed for all of Panem. Crowds always terrified her, it reminded her of the day her father died in the cave in, she had been trapped in the crowds and forced to hear her grandmother's screams of anguish, she couldn't find her escape that day. When everyone left she moved to walk out but Haymitch held her back, she looked at him with furrowed eyebrows.

"When he interviews you look for me, I'll be in the front row with the other victors. We've all had to do this; you can do it Ven. Caesar isn't going to hurt you, he will just ask you questions. Remember just how we practiced. You've got this sweetheart." He said as he gave her a quick hug before helping her walk over to the line of the waiting tributes.

"Jeez Haymitch, the poor girl is, terrified. What are you going for, for her Panem personality?" Finnick asked as he watched Ven who was still desperately clutching her river stone.

"At this point? I'm hoping we can just make it without her passing out. She isn't exactly a fan of crowds. The boy has no problem with them and should win them over no problem. I just hope they will fall in love with the little hummingbird." Finnick raised an eyebrow at the man and mouthed the word  _hummingbird_. "She has a river stone with a hummingbird. She is very similar to a hummingbird, a small little thing with a heartbeat pounding much, faster than the rest of us." Haymitch said with a smirk as he gave Ven thumbs up, she just let out an anxious sigh.

She watched a few of the interviews and couldn't help but gag at the girl from District 1, she was playing the overly flirty girl and wore a dress much too short and low-cut, she might as well have not been wearing a dress. The boy from District 2 frightened her a bit he was tall and muscular with short yet wavy blonde hair. If looks could kill then his dark blue eyes would have been a deadly weapon, it was obvious he was a huge threat and was to be avoided at all times in the arena if possible. The girl Petra was just as intimidating and her stylist worked that to their advantage and put her in a tight, black leather backless mini-dress with long sleeves. She had platform heels with silver spikes and a spiked bracelet. Her makeup was dark and her dark hair was in a straight high pony tail. The tributes from three weren't very memorable in Ven's opinion. However Logan from District 4 like many of the males from the fishing district won the people over. He was flirtatious when needed and humorous when necessary. It was obvious that he was trained by Finnick Odair, a crowd favorite. The girl however was very soft-spoken and might as well have been invisible even with Caesar's help during the interview.

"Sad thing, that isn't an act. She really is that…quiet. She hasn't said a word since she was reaped. That was the first I ever heard her say!" Ven spun around and nearly fell in her heels; Logan gave her a flirtatious wink before walking away with a laugh. Ven slowly sat down and waited for her turn, she didn't even bother watching the other tributes it just made her even more nervous than before.

"Now, ladies and gentlemen this next tribute not only grabbed my attention but I'm sure she grabbed yours too! I mean that gown, it was amazing! And that helmet…I am still seeing spots but you know what I can't wait to see the beautiful tribute that caught my attention! Give it up for Miss Lavender Hartley of DISTRICT 12!" Ven's eyes widened as she heard her name, Toby helped her up as she slowly made her way to the stage desperately trying to not fall or shake too much. The second she stepped out onto the stage the crowd cheered and a few whistled, in appreciation making her skin crawl a little.

"Oh my look at that dress, your stylist has once again out done herself!" Caesar said as he looked at Ven with a smile. Ven couldn't help but stare a little at the man's neon green hair. As she made her way over she bit her lip nervously scanning the crowd for Haymitch, when she found him she smiled. "Now, Lavender, have a seat." He said with a huge grin showing off his blindingly white teeth.

"Please, call me Ven. Everyone else does." She said with a smile, she found if she pretended that Haymitch or her grandmother were sitting in Caesar's place it wasn't too bad, just as long as she didn't look out at the crowd too often.

"Ven, what a pretty nickname! Alright now Ven, your reaping…it seems you had two very upset people crying out for you. Was it your younger brother that tried to run to you?" Caesar asked as he rested his hand on her arm as if to be sympathetic.

"No, my little brother died in childbirth years ago along with my mother. That was Gale; he is my neighbor and friend. Although I suppose if my brother had lived he would be like Gale, full of innocence and a sense of adventure." She said honestly, Caesar gave her a soft smile and nod.

"And the woman was she your grandmother then?" He asked she gave a weak nod, she felt like crying knowing that her grandmother was all alone now.

"Yes, that was my Nana. We are all that's left of my family. My father…her son died in a cave in the mines. But it's a risk we have to take for being able to support our families." She said as she discreetly held onto her river stone that rested in her lap.

"Do you work in the mines?" He asked with a tilt of his head, she supposed it was the first time in a while that District 12 had a tribute that was actually over the age of sixteen.

"Yes, I've been, working in the mines for almost a year now." Ven looked towards the crowd once again searching for Haymitch, he was like an anchor keeping her from running away or crying, she felt as if she was absorbing his strength as odd as it sounded.

"It must be dreadful in the mines. How do you manage?" He asked, her response was an honest one that she wished she had thought twice about however.

"I tend to sing during my shift. It makes time go by quicker, and it's calming." At this response Caesar's eyes widened and his eyebrows rose in delight, she knew then that she had set her own trap.

"You sing? Could you sing for us now? I would love to hear! And I'm sure the rest of Panem would love to hear you too!" She bit her lip and looked at Haymitch before turning to look backstage at Toby who was giving her a, thumbs up and mouthing  _sing_!

"No, I don't think…" She started only to be interrupted by the crowd chanting for her to sing for them, she felt her cheeks turning bright red. She never sang for people, when she did sing it was to herself so no one could actually hear! Before she could protest anymore Caesar was handing her a microphone with a grin, she tried to refuse but the chanting grew louder and louder, and she figured running from the stage wasn't a good idea. With a shaky hand she took the microphone and stood up. She took a few steps so she stood in the center of the stage and held the microphone up to her lips. She decided to sing a song her mother used to always sing, called  _When I'm Gone_. Looking at Haymitch she gave a shaky smile and began to sing, focusing on him alone so she could contain her brave façade.

" _I've got my ticket for the long way 'round_  
Two bottle whiskey for the way  
And I sure would like some sweet company  
And I'm leaving tomorrow. What d'you say?

 _When I'm gone, when I'm gone_  
_You're gonna miss me when I'm gone_  
_You're gonna miss me by my hair_  
_You're gonna miss me everywhere, oh_  
_You're gonna miss me when I'm gone_

 _When I'm gone, when I'm gone_  
_You're gonna miss me when I'm gone_  
_You're gonna miss me by my walk_  
_You're gonna miss me by my talk, oh_  
_You're gonna miss me when I'm gone_

 _I've got my ticket for the long way 'round_  
_The one with the prettiest of views_  
_It's got mountains, it's got rivers_  
_It's got sights to give you shivers_  
_But it sure would be prettier with you_

 _When I'm gone, when I'm gone_  
_You're gonna miss me when I'm gone_  
_You're gonna miss me by my walk_  
_You're gonna miss me by my talk, oh_  
_You're gonna miss me when I'm gone_

 _When I'm gone, when I'm gone_  
_You're gonna miss me when I'm gone_  
_You're gonna miss me by my hair_  
_You're gonna miss me everywhere, oh_  
_You're sure gonna miss me when I'm gone_

 _When I'm gone, when I'm gone_  
_You're gonna miss me when I'm gone_  
_You're gonna miss me by my walk_  
_You're gonna miss me by my talk, oh_  
_You're gonna miss me when I'm gone_ " When she finished singing the audience which had been silent burst into cheers and applause. She saw Haymitch give her a genuine smile and a, thumbs up mouthing  _you've got this_.

"MY, MY THAT WAS  _AMAZING_! What did you all think?!" Caesar said as he gave her a standing ovation, Ven noticed others in the audience were standing as well. She had never been so embarrassed in her life at this point; she never wanted to sing in front of a crowd like this again!

"Now why would you hide a voice like that? You have a superb singing voice!" Caesar said as he sat back down, Ven sat down shakily trying to fight back her blush but she knew it was hopeless.

"I never sang in front of an audience before…my heart is fluttering like a hummingbird's!" She said as she rested a hand on her pounding heart.

"Well, I am glad you sang for us Ven! I hope you will sing for us again…perhaps for a victory reunion?" Before she could respond the gong rang letting them know her time was up. She stood and took Caesar's hand who just kissed it before raising it in the air with a smile. "Give it up for our little hummingbird! Miss Ven Hartley! May the odds be ever in your favor, dear!" She gave a nod before walking backstage; she was greeted by Nova who was grinning and Toby who gave a nod and a quick hug to her before walking on stage for his own interview. When she made eye contact with Haymitch she let out a breath she had no idea she was holding. He held his arms open for her and out of pure instinct she ran into his arms, quickly grabbing onto his shoulders as he spun her around with a laugh.

"You did it sweetheart! You not only won them over but you  _enchanted_  them!" She couldn't help but return his smile as he gently put her back on the ground, she however refused to let him go as she finally let the tears fall she had never been so relieved to be done. As Haymitch wiped away her tears with his calloused thumbs she slowly turned to see Toby's interview.

"So Toby, can you sing as well?" Caesar asked, Toby let out a laugh and shook his head.

"Depends, is everyone here deaf? If they are then yes I can sing just as well. If not then I'll spare you from  _becoming_  deaf." The audience joined in on the laughter.

"So Toby, do you have a girl back home, one that you might have promised to return to?" Toby paused a moment and his smile faded a bit.

"It's kind of complicated. You see while there is a girl I like but, I made a promise to someone to make sure someone else comes back. You see there is this little boy who wants nothing more than to have his friend come home. And I'm just the son of a tailor. It's just me and my parents. But this someone has a grandmother who has lost too many people. And a little boy who idolizes her. I want to come home sure, but I also don't want to be selfish and break the heart of a woman who has lost more than anyone can imagine, nor of a little boy who deserves to keep the innocence he has a little bit longer. I don't want him to feel loss yet, if ever. So Caesar, no I don't have anyone to go back to. I said my goodbyes, and I made up my mind." The audience gave mixed responses, some burst into tears others simply said  _aww_. Ven however stared at Toby with wide eyes from backstage.

"What is he doing?" She asked it was Nova who responded.

"Making you even more desirable honey, that boy is practically handing you his sponsors!" Ven just stared at Toby while a few more tears threatened to spill, she had no idea he promised her grandmother and Gale that he would get her home. When the gong rang and Toby walked off the stage with one last wave she finally stepped out of Haymitch's arms. She quickly ran to give Toby a hug and let out a sob.

"Why would you do that? You have a family to go back to!" She said between her sobs, Toby had started to cry himself as he held her.

"Because like I said I already said my goodbyes Ven. You deserve a happy life. Before you say I do too, just think of Gale. Would you want him to have to lose you? Would you want your grandmother to lose another family member, her  _last_  family member? I can't do that to them, so let me do the least selfish thing I can and let me get you home alive." She just wanted to open her eyes and wake up from this nightmare.

That night Ven found, herself on the roof looking out at Capitol, from the roof it looked pretty but she had seen it up close and personal and hated it.

"Y'know from up here it's almost bearable being here…but then again we both know what bullshit that is." Ven turned to see Haymitch, she tried to give him a smile but couldn't, not when she knew this could be one of her last, nights alive.

"It was the force field…that's how I won. See I found out how they worked by complete accident. But I used it; I used the arena as my weapon. It was down to me and one of the girls from District 1, we were both severely injured. I managed to slice her eye out but she had hit me in the stomach with her axe. I ran to the force field holding my intestines in and she was right behind me. I had fallen to my knees and she threw her axe aiming for my head, but I dodged it and it bounced off and landed in her head. That's how I won." He said in almost a whisper as he slid to the ground with his back still resting on the wall behind him.

"What happened to, your fam-…" She paused a moment wondering if she should even bother finishing her question, but Haymitch answered her anyway.

"Two weeks after I was, crowned the victor…President Snow ordered the deaths of my mother, my younger brother and my girlfriend. Apparently he didn't like my stunt with the ax and the force field." At this point he didn't bother fighting back his tears he let them fall freely. Ven found her heart breaking at the sight of this grown man, he was thirty-five yet he was crying as if he was still a lost and broken child. She rose to her knees and threw her arms around the man and held him close, she did the only thing she could think of and that was comfort the broken man, she comforted him like her mother used to by holding him close and singing softly as she combed her fingers through his hair.

" _I'm so tired of being here_  
Suppressed by all my childish fears  
And if you have to leave  
I wish that you would just leave  
'Cause your presence still lingers here  
And it won't leave me alone

 _These wounds won't seem to heal_  
_This pain is just too real_  
_There's just too much that time cannot erase_

 _[Chorus:]_  
_When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears_  
_When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears_  
_And I held your hand through all of these years_  
_But you still have all of me_

 _You used to captivate me by your resonating light_  
_Now I'm bound by the life you left behind_  
_Your face—it haunts my once pleasant dreams_  
_Your voice—it chased away all the sanity in me_

 _These wounds won't seem to heal_  
_This pain is just too real_  
_There's just too much that time cannot erase_

_[Chorus]_

_I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone_  
_But though you're still with me_  
_I've been alone all along_

_[Chorus]_

_...me, me, me._ " She sang softly, she had once been told her voice was soothing but up until her interview earlier that day she never really sang for anyone besides her grandmother and Gale once when he had broken his arm and wouldn't stop crying. Haymitch seemed to have calmed a bit as he realized that he had broken down in front of her, it wasn't exactly helpful for a tribute to see their mentor lose it like he just had.

"Sorry…" He whispered as he tried to pull away, she simply shook her head and held him close.

"Don't ever apologize for crying, I understand. The games still haunt you. If you didn't lose it every once and awhile that's when I'd be worried." She said with a small smile. She realized at this moment things would be, different between them, they both had seen the other breakdown and cry yet they didn't run away like other people would. She actually believed that he would do whatever it took to get her sponsors. It was at this moment she came to the, realization that she was slowly falling in love with her mentor, and it terrified her almost as much as dying in the games.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NINE pages and about 4,712 words. I hope you guys like it, but even if you don't let me know in a REVIEW!  
> FYI I do NOT own the songs Ven sings, they belong to Anna Kendrick (Cups [When I'm Gone]) and Evanescence (My Immortal) .


	5. Never Say Goodbye

The day had come; it was the morning of the 69th Annual Hunger Games. Ven wanted to throw herself from the rooftops but she knew even if there wasn’t a force field she could never actually jump. She got out of her warm bed and bit back her tears; she was done crying she had done enough crying the past week. She slowly made her way to the door and opened it with a sigh, she didn’t bother looking around the room one last time it was too painful, and it was like another goodbye she wasn’t ready for. When she walked out of the room she saw Leto who was waiting for her with tears in her eyes the two had become close friends in the past few days. The Avox threw her arms around Ven with a sob. Ven gave the girl a sad smile as she returned the hug.

“Thanks for being a friend Leto, I’m gonna miss you.” She whispered as she let go of the girl, it was hard to fight back the tears but she managed she was just glad that the girl understood. When she walked into the dining room she refused to look at Toby, it made her guilty that she knew he would sacrifice himself for her. Was it wrong to wish she died before he got the chance?

“Can you believe it? It’s finally here! The Hunger Games! Oh I wonder what the arena will be like this year; last year was a desert and so dull looking…nothing worth noting.” Olympia said much too cheerfully for the rest of the room who all glared at her.

After their breakfast Ven and Toby were taken to the hovercraft dock to be taken to the games. Ven turned to look at Haymitch who was behind her; he looked a mix between being nervous and hurt. They both knew this could be the last time that they ever saw each other again.

“Goodbye Haymitch.” She whispered he shook his head as he placed his hands on her shoulder.

“Never say goodbye, goodbye means going away and going away means forgetting.” She couldn’t help but smile; he had quoted _Peter Pan_ a story her mother used to read to her as a child, the two had found out that they shared a love of the story. “I intend to keep my promise sweetheart. Remember nothing at the cornucopia is worth being a bloodbath victim. So don’t try and get a weapon if it isn’t already near your exit.” He said as he gave her one last hug, she nodded weakly as she hugged him back.

Once on the hovercraft she looked around, once again Logan was there she was growing sick of his flirtatious winks. She noticed that Toby wasn’t in the same hovercraft and frowned, perhaps it was for the best?

“Arm out.” A woman said as she grabbed Ven’s arm to insert a tracker, Ven let out a squeak at the pain. When they arrived at the arena entrance they were each taken to a separate room to get changed in what for all but one would be their final outfit. A Peacekeeper opened the door and gave her an impatient shove, if it hadn’t been for Nova catching her she would have landed on her face. Her stylist gave her a weak smile before leading her behind a curtain to change. She noticed that the outfit for the arena was a heavy grey winter coat with black lining and cuffs the District 12 logo rested near the left shoulder, light grey almost white snow pants, black snow boots and black gloves; it didn’t take a genius to see that the games would be set in a cold and snowy arena. After changing into what could be her very last outfit she stepped out from behind the changing screen, Nova gave her a sad smile. In silence Nova braided her hair in what she called a prairie braid so it rested a bit on her right shoulder and handed Ven her hat, it was black and had her district logo on it.

“All Tributes please enter the individual arena elevators.” A voice spoke over the loud speaker. Inside the tube like elevator it was claustrophobic; Ven found herself struggling to breathe at the enclosed feeling.

“VEN! Slowly count to ten! Breathe deep breaths!” Nova said as she tapped on the glass, following her advice she slowly counted as she took deep breaths, after counting to ten for the fourth time a bright light blinded Ven as she approached the surface. Light was reflecting off of snow, there was so much snow. She looked around in awe as she saw mountains covered in snow; she had never seen mountains like that before. Despite being the very place that could get her killed it was beautiful but she remembered that she had to pay attention in order to survive. The clock was ticking down the last minute, she noticed she was near the male from District 10, a tall and lanky boy of 14 with curly brunette hair and the girl from District 7 she was sixteen with long brunette hair in two braids, they weren’t as big a threat as Districts 1 and 2 but they couldn’t be underestimated. She knew that looks could be deceiving previous victors often proved that.

“TEN…NINE….EIGHT…SEVEN…SIX…FIVE…..FOUR….THREE….TWO….ONE!” The announcer said over the loud speaker when the announcer said one a loud gong rang, immediately Ven jumped from her podium and sprinted towards to snowy woods. She heard screams from all directions as tributes slaughtered each other. She noticed ahead of her was a black back pack and decided to grab in while still running. Before she could reach it she felt as if a train hit her, she twisted her body in mid fall and saw it was the boy from District 5. The brunette tried to wrestle her to the ground as he held a knife to her throat. This was it, her final moments she wanted to just let it happen but something in her snapped and she fought, she refused to die she didn’t want to die. As she fought the boy she heard a sound she would never forget, a sickening _thunk_ as the boy was stabbed from behind. She screamed as he spit blood onto her face with a whimper before falling to the side his blood stained the pure white snow, she noticed in his back was a trident, it had nearly gone all the way through meaning the person who threw it had serious strength and skill with the weapon.

“You alright there Twelve?” She looked up to see Logan smirking; she couldn’t believe he could smirk after having just killed a boy. Immediately she sprang to her feet and sprinted towards the woods like she planned before she didn’t slow down even as she bent to snag the backpack. When she got closer to the woods she noticed too late that it was a hill, sliding down the snowy hill she let out a yelp as she found rocks beating into her back and legs she held onto the backpack for dear life. She could feel twigs scratching at her cheeks drawing some blood, but she was alive. She managed to make it out of the bloodbath without getting herself killed. She looked around for some form of shelter so she could catch her breath and search the contents of her bag. To her left was a small cave, but she wasn’t an idiot and knew that something or even someone could be inside. Grabbing a rock from outside the cave she threw it in, hearing an echo of it hitting the stone floor. She didn’t hear anything else but figured she should still be cautious. Grabbing a large branch she figured she better take a chance if there wasn’t something in there then it would be an amazing shelter. She waited a minute for her eyes to adjust to the dark as she quietly entered the dark cave, she didn’t see any movement or any sign of something living there, but she saw there were multiple tunnels. It was almost like the mines from back home, she surprisingly felt at ease in the cave. Continuing down a tunnel she paused when she heard running water, she suddenly felt as if the temperature was quickly rising, she began to sweat. Slowly she approached the end of the tunnel and let out a gasp, in front of her was an underground water fall, she noticed the steam rising from the water and realized she had found a hot spring. She wanted nothing more than to dive into the water and never leave; she had just realized how cold she really was.  She slowly knelt in front of the water as she pulled off her gloves and placed her hands in the warm water with a satisfied sigh, it felt amazing on her cold fingers. Looking around she realized that this would be an ideal location for her shelter, warmth, cover from the elements, it was secluded and it had fresh water. Quickly pulling her gloves back on she decided to explore the tunnels some more, but before she left the spring she made a mark on the stone wall she was smart enough to know to make marks so  she knew where she had been.

After exploring more of the tunnels she had found a giant ice crevice and the tunnel led to the bottom of it she could see that if she had proper climbing gear she could reach the surface where the others were making a mark on the wall she went down another tunnel. The next tunnel opened up into a forest much like the one she came in through in the first entrance however this one was slightly different, just through the forest was a giant frozen lake which was attached to a river if a river was frozen she realized the water must be beyond freezing either that or the ice must be very thin. Walking back into the tunnel she continued to walk in the tunnel until she reached the previous tunnel and made a mark she could identify as forest and river, she drew a squiggle with a triangle above it. That was good enough for her. She realized that night was approaching and they were going to soon announce the tributes who died in the blood bath. As if they had read her mind she heard the music they always played before the cannon fire of the first night’s dead. She ran into the ice room as she called it and looked up and saw she could see a reflection of the hologram and put a finger up for each dead. The list showed both tributes from District 10, the girl from District 7, both from District 5, the girl from District 6, and the boy from District 3. She counted on her fingers that _seven_ in the blood bath that meant there were seventeen left.  

Late in the night she awoke with a jump at the sound of a cannon soon followed by another loud boom of the second cannon that meant two more were dead. She walked over to a stone wall and looked at the wall where she had been keeping track of the fallen. She made a mark but didn’t know who to cross off the list, so two marks to the side were good enough. She had considered going back to bed but was too hungry her stomach had begun to growl so she figured it would be smart to find some food. Realizing she had yet to look in the bag she had managed to grab she knelt down to look inside. She saw she had a canteen, matches, tinted goggles, some dried meat and fruit, what looked like rock climbing gear and a pocket knife. These items would be useful later on, she decided to save the dried meat and fruit for when she really needed it unlike other tributes she was capable of finding food. Sneaking out of the caves she found herself in the woods looking for something to eat. She was glad that she made the effort to learn to tell the difference between poisonous plants and non-poisonous as she gathered berries she saw on a bush there weren’t many due to it being covered in snow but it was something.

While scavenging she managed to find several berries and some nuts it wasn’t much but she was used to eating little, one of the very few perks of being from District 12. On her way back to the caves she heard the snow crunch behind her someone was behind her. She quickly spun around only to see Lux, the girl from District 3. Her eyes were wide like a doe that had been caught by a hunter.

“The Career Pack…they aren’t too far from here.” She whispered, she was hesitant as if she didn’t know if Ven was going to kill her or not. “They killed him…they killed Edison. Eddie was my friend. We grew up together…” She said with a whimper, Ven stayed frozen in her spot for a while until she noticed how much the girl was shivering the girl didn’t have a coat on which was a stupid thing to do.

“Where is your coat?” She asked Lux looked around cautiously before answering her in a whisper, she was always whispering afraid if she spoke in her normal voice something would happen.

“There was so much…the blood…I tried to run away but got stuck. They were chasing me and I got caught on a branch. I left it b-behind.” Ven reached out for the girl slowly only to have her jump back in surprise.

“I’m not going to hurt you. Come on you need to get warm. You are turning blue.” Lux tilted her head a moment before giving a weak nod. She was muttering to herself, it was obvious that the girl had been in the cold too long and was slowly losing it. Ven led her towards the caves but stopped only when she heard what could be described as a train horn, she was confused surely the Gamemakers weren’t sending a muttation of a train. It was Lux that saw what it was coming towards them and gasped in horror.

“RUN!” She screamed as she pulled Ven by the arm. Ice was quickly coming towards them freezing everything in its sight in a matter of seconds. The two girls ran for the caves Ven saw Lux trip and quickly pulled the girl up and put her on her back so she could carry her. It was hard to carry the weight of someone else while running but she kept telling herself it was just Gale, if she convinced herself it was Gale it was a little easier. The two managed to get into the caves and around the corner just in time the ice hit the wall with a force that sounded like shattering glass. Ven continued to carry Lux who was slowly drifting into a state of unconsciousness she knew she had to get the girl warm soon before she froze to death. Once she got to the hot spring she knelt down and laid Lux down next to the warmth of the water. She considered putting the girl into the water but it would be too much of a shock and could potentially kill the girl, so laying her next to the spring was enough for now. The sound of the ice storm roared above them but the heat of the hot spring kept the cold from reaching them which Ven was thankful for she really didn’t want to freeze to death. But she remembered hearing it was actually one of the most peaceful ways to die in the games, you would slowly fall asleep and your body just shut down resulting in you never waking again. But she made a promise to Gale she would try her hardest to come home to him.

Hours, it had to have been hours since the ice storm started but it had finally ended the loud roars and whistling of the storm had finally calmed. Not a minute later there were four consecutive booms from the cannons. Ven slipped out of the hot spring chambers and went to the chamber with her list of dead. She marked four more off to the side since she still didn’t know who had been killed. The sound of the anthem echoed in the caves apparently the storm lasted much longer than she thought. Then again she had dozed off for a bit here and there during the storm. She looked up and saw the latest deaths were the girl from four, both from eight and the boy from nine. That meant twelve dead total, and _twelve_ left. Thankfully she hadn’t seen Toby yet meaning he had managed to find shelter from the storm and strangely she was glad to see that Logan wasn’t among the dead even if he did get on her nerves. She let out a tired sigh as she stood up and slowly started to make her way back to Lux. The girl had yet to move from her spot and Ven began to wonder if she had died in her sleep and they just forgot to set off her cannon. She placed a hand in front of the girl’s nose and mouth, waiting a moment to see if she could feel her breath she let out a sigh of relief when she felt a faint breath against her hand.

\--

Toby had managed to escape the bloodbath by pure luck. He had been running behind the boy from District 3 when he had stumbled, Toby had just barely passed the boy when a spear thrown by one of the Careers landed in the boy’s back killing him instantly. He had managed to get to the frozen river and to find a small hiding spot in the rocky mountainous terrain. He had no weapons, he had no food and didn’t know if the water was even safe to drink but at least he had shelter. He slowly crept up to the spot and picked up a rock throwing it into the hiding spot only to hear a squeak. He jumped back and grabbed another rock not knowing what to expect, he surly hadn’t expected the small girl from District 11. Her big brown eyes looked back at him and he quickly lowered the rock in his hand.

“I’m not going to hurt you. I just…I just wanted some shelter.” He said softly, she reminded him of the kids he saw in his District so small and innocent.

“There is plenty of room in here. It’s bigger than it looks.” She said in a soft voice, he figured he would be fine to make an alliance if it kept him from freezing in the elements.

“I’m Toby by the way.” He said offering his hand to the girl who smiled at him and offered her own with a bright smile.

“I’m Maisie.” He could see why the people of Panem adored the small girl, she still had an aura of innocence that only came with being so young she reminded him of his childhood friend Rosalie who had been reaped when she was thirteen just like Maisie. Which is why he had the strong urge to protect this small girl, he wanted nothing more than to shelter her from the horrors of the games. It was an instinct that conflicted with his urge to keep Ven safe, to keep his word to her grandmother and to get her home to the young boy Gale who was waiting for Ven to come home. Yet as disturbing as the thought that perhaps with Maisie dying in the games it would be the humane thing. So she wouldn’t join the ranks of the Victors who were still haunted by their own games.

“What are you thinking about? You seem far away.” He jumped a little at the sound of the girl’s voice, he had almost forgotten where he was something that was dangerous when you were in the games.

“Just thinking, sorry did you say something?” He asked the small girl shook her head and curled into his side silently he looked down at her curiously as she pulled out a sleeping bag and unzipped it to cover them both.

“I’m used to curling up against my siblings…I’m actually glad you found me I wouldn’t have been able to sleep without someone next to me.” She whispered with a small yawn. He gave a small chuckle he never had siblings yet he had always wanted siblings, his mother had trouble even conceiving one child it took his parents nearly ten years before they had him. As a result they pampered him which he hated as a child but now, now he missed it more than ever. Even at eighteen his mother would sing him to sleep, it made him smile at the thought now. Yet he still found himself humming the lullaby she always sang to him.

“What are you humming?” Maisie asked with a yawn looking up at Toby with her bright doe like brown eyes, he thought she had fallen asleep but apparently she hadn’t.

“It’s a song my Mom sang me to sleep to. It’s called _The Parting Glass_. It’s an old song that our family has known since even before the Rebellion.” Maisie smiled at him and asked in her innocent little voice if he could sing it to her, he never had a voice like his mother. And he sure didn’t have a voice like Ven.

“I’m not a singer. Trust me you would not want me to sing.” Maisie giggled at his protesting but understood not everyone was able to sing.

“Fine, can you keep humming it then?” She asked, and of course he couldn’t refuse the girl. Not too long after he continued to hum the song Maisie had fallen asleep curled into his side. He heard the anthem play and looked out of their hiding spot to see the faces of the fallen tributes he was thankful the he didn’t see Ven’s face.

When he woke he heard his stomach growl, he hadn’t eaten since yesterday morning. He wanted nothing more than to get up and look for something to eat but Maisie was still sleeping and was holding him tightly in her small arms. He supposed waiting until the girl woke was the best option however she soon woke with a start when there was a loud howl from wind blowing. She leaned out to look outside the small opening they hid in and immediately jumped back in.

“It looks like a storm of some sort. We might be stuck here for a while.” She furrowed her brows as she heard his stomach growl realizing he was hungry. She pulled out a backpack he hadn’t seen earlier with a small smile.

“It’s not much, but I got this when I was fleeing the cornucopia. It has some biscuits in it…I also managed to scavenge some nuts before I found this place. Don’t worry they are all from the edible plants and berries list. And we have a sleeping bag…” She said as she handed him a handful of nuts and berries as well as half of a biscuit. The two ate in silence as they watched the storm. They heard a scream as the female tribute from District 4 tried to out run the storm. Toby jumped to his feet and reached a hand out to the terrified girl.

“HERE! IN HERE!” He screamed the girl tried to make it to the shelter only she wasn’t fast enough and the ice instantly froze the girl. Toby saw what the storm could do and immediately threw himself on top of Maisie, shielding her from the bitter storm. He threw the sleeping bag over them and hissed as he felt the cold even through the sleeping bag but he knew it would have been much worse without it.

He wasn’t sure how long it had been but when he finally no longer felt the bitterness of the ice storm he hesitantly peaked out from the sleeping bag, their shelter was covered in ice. Maisie looked up at him when the cannons went off, the number of dead at this point was twelve. Half of the tributes were gone. The list once again appeared in the night sky; the boy from three, the girl from four, both from five, both from six, the girl from seven, both from eight, both from nine and once again both tributes from ten.

\--

Ven hadn’t even remembered falling asleep once again until she heard a loud cannon boom followed shortly by another. It was the second cannon boom that made Lux jump up she was finally awake.

“Look who decided to wake up. I won’t be able to fall back asleep for a while so I’m going to go find some m--.” Before she could finish her sentence she heard a loud scream and a thud, judging by the noise it was in what the chamber with the crevice. Someone must have fallen. She told Lux to wait a moment as she went to go investigate the closer she got she could hear voices.

“Should we help him Paris? He is still alive…and our friend…” It was a girl talking from the sound of her voice it was the girl from District 1. It was the boy from District 2 that answered her harshly.

“Oh shut up Lace. It’s one less tribute to deal with! And there are no friends in the damn games you idiot!” He snapped the girl whimpered in fear before they all left. Ven silently made her way into the chamber and noticed the one who fell was Logan. He was banged up pretty well too from what she could see and his leg was broken…no shattered, she concluded when she inspected it. Part of the bone actually went through his skin and tore through his pants. She knew she wouldn’t be able to carry him herself so she ran back to Lux and asked her to help. It seemed Ven couldn’t change her nurturing nature and was helping people more than hurting, in fact since she entered the arena she hadn’t hurt anyone.

\--

Toby and Maisie had left their shelter to find some food, they were running low and they needed to find some water too.  Luckily there was snow surrounding them but they figured it would be better if they used some of the iodine tablets that had been hidden in the bag. But water didn’t solve their food shortage problem. Which is how they found themselves in the woods scavenging for food. That is how the Career Pack found them, it all happened before either of them could react. Maisie had let out a scream as a sharp throwing knife flew into her stomach, Toby knew the second he saw the knife land in the girl’s stomach she was done for. But that didn’t stop him from picking her up and running. He must have stumbled a million times before he finally fell to his knees.  Tears burned behind his closed eyes he couldn’t let Maisie see his tears, she had to see him be brave for her.

“T-Toby…i-it hurts!” She sobbed as he held her in his arms, there was so much blood and he couldn’t do a damn thing about it.

“HAYMITCH! PLEASE! SOMEONE HELP!” He screamed, someone in Captiol had to care about this girl enough to sponsor her right? She began to cough and during her coughing fit her lips were stained crimson he knew enough about injuries that if you coughed up blood you didn’t have long.

“T-Toby…I-I d-don’t w-want t-t-to d-die…” She sobbed, he gently brushed her unruly curls out of her face and held her as if she were an infant. He couldn’t save her but he could make it easier, he would distract her, comfort her and hold her close in her last moments.

“Tell me about your siblings…how many do you have? What are their names?” He asked trying to keep her from looking at her wound. She looked up at him with tears in her eyes as he pulled the knife out.

“S-six b-brothers…T-Thorn…C-Cane….T-Till…M-Milo….R-Reuben…Gr-Granger…a-and B-Bran…” She stuttered Toby smiled softly at her.

“How old are Thorn, Cane, Till, Milo, Reuben, Granger and Bran? Are they older than you? Or younger than you?” He asked she seemed to smile a little bit besides the obvious pain she was in. Just as long as she didn’t look at the wound or the now crimson colored snow. She seemed to find enough strength to stutter less when she answered, talking about her brothers gave her courage and strength.

“Thorn…is t-twenty, C-Cane n-nineteen, Till is f-fourteen, Milo is…is…twelve, R-Reuben is e-eleven, Gran-Granger…is ten a-and B-Bran is…is n-nine.” She still stuttered a bit as she tried to bite back a painful moan while speaking. He began to gently rock her in his arms as if comforting an infant.

“I’m an only child. Must be nice to have so many siblings.” He said as she whimpered in pain once more. “Maisie? Do, me a favor tell me about your brothers…what are they like? What’s it like having siblings?” He asked again, the girl softly spoke of how much she missed her brothers and what it was like to have brothers and stories about them. He noticed she was breathing a lot slower than before but refused to worry her by pointing it out. He then felt her go limp in his arms and knew she was gone, he let out a sob as he closed her now dull and lifeless brown eyes. Wiping away the blood that stained her lips he laid her in a clean pile of snow and picked one of the snowdrops that were nearby and placed them in her hands. He stood just as the cannon boomed and slowly walked back to the crimson stained snow and picked up the knife. He would find Maisie’s killer, he would avenge the poor innocent Maisie.

“Look what we have here! Aww did your poor little brat die? Of course she did! I threw the knife! Wait ‘til the others hear how I killed the brat and you!” Came the stuck up voice of the girl from District 1. She however didn’t notice that he was holding the knife she had thrown and she sure wasn’t prepared for him to run towards her and tackle her to the ground. She let out a screech as he stabbed her in the chest right where her heart was, the cannon boomed as the girl died. He felt sick to his stomach he killed someone, sure she had it coming but wanting someone dead and killing them were two very different things. He let out a sob as he let the tears fall as he jumped back from the body in disgust.

\--

Ven had been taking care of Logan all through the night and had managed to set his leg, poorly of course but it was set. Lux had managed to gather some more nuts and berries for them to eat and a parachute for Logan came while he was unconscious, Ven knew it was for him because the donation was an ointment for his wound inside was a note for her and one for Logan when he woke.

**_Apply generously and stay alive little hummingbird. PS 4 says thanks. -H_ **

**_Thank Twelve. More to come. –F_ **

She smiled at Haymitch’s note as she put the ointment on Logan’s wounds as told. She looked at Lux with a tired smile before speaking up.

“I’m going to get some more food. Stay here and watch over him. I’ll be back soon.” She said as she stood up her knees cracked painfully from being in a kneeling position for too long. She realized that she didn’t have a weapon so she picked the closest one to her which was a trident, she had never really used one before and it felt strange in her hands so she placed it on the ground next to Logan and instead picked up a knife.

She felt as if she had been walking for hours in the knee deep snow, it was a lot deeper than it was the last time she had been out meaning it must have snowed when she was tending to Logan. She saw that the river was still frozen and the only berries for miles were on the other side, she and Lux had already eaten those nearest to the cave and she didn’t want to stray too far not with Lux and Logan still being behind virtually unprotected.

It had been awhile since she had seen other tributes besides Lux and Logan, so when she did see one it was quite a shock. It was even more of a shock when the girl chased after her. She ran across the river not once checking if she was in the safe portion a mistake that could prove fatal but survival instincts kicked in. The girl threw knives at her making her scream in terror as she tried to run on the slippery ice, she felt a knife dig into her right shoulder but she continued to run the girl was right behind her. Out of sheer luck Ven tripped and her knee hit the ice, cracking it as she scrambled away the girl stepped on the weak patch of ice while trying to get to Ven and fell into the freezing water. The girl screeched in terror as the freezing water seemed to stab her with a million knifes. Ven tried to get away but the girl had managed to grab her leg and pull her towards the water, Ven wasn’t sure if it was to pull her in or to get herself out of the freezing water and she was just the closest thing she could grab.

“MASON! PARIS! HELP!” She screamed as she swallowed the freezing water as she bobbed up and down trying to get out. Ven clawed at the ice trying to get away from the girl’s grasp, with a terrified scream she kicked the girl who tried to drag her into the freezing water, the girl let out a howl of pain before slipping into the freezing water, the only sound after that was the cannon's boom. She had killed the girl from District 2. She had taken a life and it terrified her, it made her skin crawl she was a murderer!  She began to sob as she curled into a ball not caring if the ice cracked and the freezing river swallowed her whole. She watched the blood from her shoulder drip and soak into the ice and cried even harder, how could she ever live with herself? She now understood why the victors were so haunted, she would never forget the face or the screams of Petra…she remembered her name was. The girl from District 2, the girl she murdered…the girl who would never go home to her friends and family because of her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This seemed like a good place to stop. I originally planned to keep going until the end of the games, but it was TEN pages and 5925 words. Yikes! But I am working on the next chapter now. It won't be a long chapter like this but just to wrap up the games due to this story being more about post 69th Hunger Games. REVIEW please love hearing feedback! And do take the time to check out the polyvore collection I made for this story!


	6. Nothing Glamorous About It

Ven hated herself more than she ever had in her life, she had killed a girl. How could she ever look at anyone again and pretend that she didn’t hate herself? She felt as if she deserved to die right then and there surely her Nana would understand? And Gale…she let out another loud sob at the thought of Gale how could she look at him and not be terrified of him being reaped like she had been? Of him being killed in the games by someone like her who didn’t even think about anyone but themselves. She only opened her eyes when she heard the soft chime of a sponsor gift. She slowly reached out a hand to grab the gift and pull it close. She opened it and saw a muffin like one in the bakery in District 12. Inside was also a note from Haymitch.

**_Chin up sweetheart. You’re not alone. –H_ **

She looked up towards the sky with a few tears still in her eyes and tried to think of what she had waiting for her at home and besides even if everyone hated her back home at least she had Haymitch, he understood what she was going through. She slowly stood up and grabbed the muffin with a small smile, it was nice knowing Haymitch was still there for her. She wiped away her tears and made her way towards the caves deciding to pass on finding nuts and berries.

When she made it back to the cave she noticed that Logan was finally awake and was even sitting up. The ointment had done wonders it looked as if he hadn’t even been hurt.

“I believe I owe you a thanks?” He said with an actual smile on his face. She returned the smile as she sat next to him and offered him some of the muffin. Lux let out a scream and Ven spun around to see what she screamed at and saw that the two remaining Career Pack members were standing at the entrance.

“Well, well, well look at that Paris, the bitch from twelve and look the missing girl from three! And they helped Logan, how cute.” Mason spat, the boy from District 2 held up his sword with a snarl. Lux helped Logan stand and he grabbed his trident. Before anyone could move they felt the ground shake. They all looked around to see what was causing it and they quickly realized the Gamemakers were causing it. Ven looked up and saw snow beginning to pour in from the cracks.

“THEY ARE MAKING AN EARTHQUAKE TO CAUSE AN AVALANCHE!” She screamed as she made a move to run, the others quickly followed. Ven threw Logan’s arm over her shoulder to help him run a little faster since his leg was still technically broken. Luckily they weren’t too far from the cornucopia and there was a path that went up hill she quickly looked behind her to see how close the rushing snow was from them and to see who was behind her. She couldn’t see Lux anywhere but she kept running she had to get to higher ground. She heard a scream from behind her and couldn’t place who it was but she knew it was one of the remaining male tributes. She thanked whatever higher power existed that she and Logan made it to the cornucopia and nearly screamed in shock when she saw the snow come rushing towards them, only before it reached them it looked as if it hit an invisible wall.

“A force field.” Logan said from beside her as he watched in awe at the snow. Ven looked around to see if she could see Lux but couldn’t see the girl anywhere, she did however hear two cannon fires signaling two more tributes were dead. She bit back a sob she had begun to see the other girl as a friend over the past few days.

“VEN!” She heard someone call her name and spun around to see Toby, she hadn’t seen him since the morning of day one in the arena. He ran over to her and threw his arms around her, she flinched at first not knowing how to react at first. But then she realized there had only been _two_ cannon fires, meaning there were _four_ remaining tributes including herself.

“Isn’t that sweet! A little District 12 reunion! Makes it easier to kill you both now.” Toby looked over Ven’s shoulder and saw Mason pacing like a caged animal slashing his sword in the air as if to show them exactly what he planned to do to them with the sharp blade. As he took a step towards them an ungodly scream came from the woods behind the cornucopia. The four remaining tributes all jumped at the sound, and out of the woods came a pack of mutation mountain lions. The mountain lions looked to be nearly the size of a bear as they stalked towards them with their long and sharp teeth glittering in the sunlight. Toby moved Ven behind him with a terrified gulp, yet the instinct to protect her outweighed his fear. Mason slashed at one of the mountain lions as it approached him and the beast howled in pain and raised a huge paw at the boy before pouncing on him. The sight of the boy being eaten alive was the most terrifying thing Ven had ever seen. She wanted to run but knew any wrong move and it would draw attention to her and Toby. She watched in horror as part of the pack surrounded Logan who just let out what could only be called a battle cry, he spun his trident around slicing and stabbing the beasts as they tried to get close to him. Watching him left Ven and Toby in awe, he moved as if the trident was a part of him and he spun like it was a dance. However graceful he was he could not hold off all of the muttations as they pounced on him and began to tear him to shreds in a matter of seconds. His screams were a sound that would forever haunt Ven if she survived the games.

“Ven…when I say to run.” Toby whispered as they slowly backed away. “NOW!” He screamed as one of the muttations ran towards him he threw his arms up and managed to wrestle the beast and stab it in the neck killing it. Ven ran as fast as she could her heart pounding so hard she felt as if it would burst right out of her chest. She heard thunderous paws hitting the ground as a muttation followed after her she screamed as it felt as if razors dug into her back and shoulders throwing her to the ground. She felt the beast ripping at her flesh as if it were nothing but tissue paper. They say when you are about to die your life flashes before your eyes, but hers didn’t, instead she just felt the worst pain of her life and the urge to just run away from the pain. But she couldn’t run the muttation had her, pinned to the ground. She screamed even louder as she heard two cannon fires yet she had no idea who it was for she just knew she felt as if she was on fire as the beast ripped her flesh. She managed to somehow turn her body and face the monster that was going to eat her alive and out of pure instinct clawed at the beast. It let out a howl and fell on top of her with a sword in its back. Toby stood over it and reached to help her only to be tackled by another her once again managed to fight the muttation off with a knife. However Ven wasn’t as lucky she screamed as another muttation pounced on her as she tried to get to her feet and run. She kicked at the muttation which only seemed to anger her as it bit onto her leg just above her right knee and ripped it off. She screamed in terror and pain, looking down she saw nothing but a bloody stump where she once had a leg.

“HEY! HEY YOU DAMN MUTT! OVER HERE!” Toby screamed as he threw a rock at the muttation making it turn towards him, he looked at Ven and he gave her one last smile before drawing attention to himself, saving her. He raised the knife to his throat and sliced it, Ven screamed as she heard the cannon fire and saw him fall to the ground the muttations stopped their actions and turned to run towards the forest before disappearing from her sight.

“LADIES AND GENTLEMEN I PRESENT TO YOU THE WINNER OF THE 69TH ANNUAL HUNGER GAMES! LAVENDER HARTLEY OF DISTRICT 12!” With the announcement she felt herself give into the pain and black out enjoying the feeling of nothingness.

\--

Ven felt someone holding her hand and a faint whisper, it sounded familiar yet it was fuzzy and sounded far away. She slowly tried to open her eyes and when she did it felt as if she had been hit by a sledgehammer.

“Hey there sweetheart. Take it easy…you’ve been through hell and back.” She turned to see who spoke and saw Haymitch, she let out a sob if she was seeing Haymitch it meant that Toby sacrificing himself wasn’t some cruel dream.

“Oh thank the gods of _sequins_! NOVA! SHE IS AWAKE!” Came a loud voice to her left she looked to see who it was and saw Augustus who gave her a smile. “You had us worried honey.” He said as he looked at the door which Nova was now standing in.  Nova didn’t say anything but gave her a soft smile, while she was happy she was alive she wasn’t naïve about the life of victors and never wanted that life for Ven. Ven was silent a moment before she realized she couldn’t feel her leg, it just seemed as if it was numb and she looked down at her right leg.

“Sweetheart…there is something you should know…” Haymitch said cautiously the fact that he said it that way terrified her, could the nightmare with the mutt ripping it clear off have been true? She looked at Haymitch with tears in her eyes, silently begging him he was just playing a cruel joke on her. “They tried to save it…but it was…the damage…” He continued as he held her hand as she began to sob after she understood what he was saying her leg was _gone_. She lifted the blanket and let out a mix between a scream of terror and a sob. Where she once had a right leg was nothing but a stump, the rest of the leg from just above where her knee should have been was _gone_. It made her sick to see it to remember what caused it, that Toby sacrificed himself for her yet this still happened.

She was still on bed rest for a few more days due to the extent of her injuries and not to mention they had to fit her for a prosthetic leg. She hated it, it was uncomfortable and made her even clumsier. But like he promised Haymitch was there by her side the whole time, whether it were for emotional and moral support or physical strength when she was trying to learn to walk again.

\--

It was the sixth day of her physical therapy when President Snow made an appearance, she had never seen the man face to face before at least not this close. While many would be terrified in his presence she had to bite back anger, knowing that this man was the reason she suffered so much why all the victors suffered so much.

“Ms. Hartley, a pleasure to meet you. Now normally I would have a different _proposition_ for a girl like you, with such beauty. But it seems your recent…injury, has made you less… _desirable_. However there is still something the people want from you. They want you to sing, make appearances and what not. Before you even protest as I’m sure judging by the look on your face, let me make it clear if you refuse there will be serious repercussions. I’d hate for something to happen to your grandmother in her _frail_ state, or for that boy…if he were to fall while in his prime…but then again things happen.” She felt her skin crawl at his words and her nose burned at the scent of roses, she once loved the smell of roses but since coming to Capitol she hated them. There were too many roses in Capitol and she gagged when she smelt the genetically altered roses. President Snow’s threat was rather clear even if he spoke in what people who didn’t know better was just a simple conversational tone.

“Are we in agreement on these…requests?” Snow asked as he took a sip of his tea, she could only nod in response and just silently pray to all the deities past and present whatever or whoever they were, that she would wake up from this nightmare in her warm bed in District 12 and find that none of this truly happened. When Snow was satisfied with her response he gave her a smile and quietly made his exit.

The moment the doors closed when he left she let out a sob, how could her life have taken such a horrible turn? What had she done to have been reaped in the first place? She had been crying so hard she hadn’t seen Haymitch come into the room and kneel beside her before wrapping his arms around her soothingly, she had jumped in response but soon wrapped her own arms around her mentor.

“Hey, hey sweetheart you’re not alone. Just let it out.” He said as he cradled her face in his hands wiping away her tears. She looked into his blue eyes which were so focused on her tears that he didn’t notice she was watching him. He had no idea she had slowly fallen in love with him before the games and that she wanted nothing more than to tell him, but she didn’t the last thing she needed was rejection to add to her already mile long list of pain and humiliation.

“They want me to keep singing. If I don’t, he will kill my Nana and Gale…” She sobbed he simply sighed as he brushed her hair out of her tear streaked face.

“Believe it or not you got off easy sweetheart. Other victors…they aren’t as lucky. They don’t just sell their voices to the highest bidder…they sell themselves. So sweetheart in a twisted way losing your leg…it was a blessing in disguise.” He whispered, she gasped in shock at his words how could people do such a thing? She wanted to run away from everything to just forget about it all.

\--

The day of her reunion show interview was already unpleasant. She had woken up with a terrible headache from having cried herself to sleep again, her face was red and blotchy not to mention swollen. Nova had shown up at ten to get her prepped, apparently it would take much longer to get her ready than last time. Not once did her stylist and friend comment on her face as she cleaned it with cool water and then did her makeup, which was a dramatic black smoky eye and a clear gloss on her lips. Her nails were painted a shimmery dark green and her hair left down in volumed waves. The dress was a sweetheart neckline little black dress with a stunning full length high neck sheer overlay which is split center front, which covered her prosthetic leg. It had a hook and eye and invisible zip at center back for a flattering fit. The dress was paired with a pair of black platform heels, dangling earrings that had pearl and green stones with antiqued silver with a serpent design and a silver and a silver cuff bracelet with an oval malachite stone that had what Nova called a Celtic design on each side. While she had to admit she looked amazing she felt horrible at the same time. She was sick of being Capitol’s doll, she wanted to dress in what _she_ wanted she wanted to do what _she_ wanted and to say what _she_ wanted.

“There I’m finished.” Nova said more to herself than Ven, she looked at her reflection and sighed. There wasn’t much that she could do.

When it was time to make her way to her reunion interview she slowly made her way to the elevator. Haymitch came up beside her and took her arm with a weak smile as he helped her balance much like he had the first time.

“You look amazing sweetheart.” He whispered in her ear making her blush, he had to have known the effect he had on her right?

Her interview began with Caesar welcoming her to the stage with his giant grin and bright colored hair. She tried to ignore the loud cheering from her so called adoring fans, they made her sick! How could they love a murderer? When she sat down Caesar went on about how lovely she looked, how brave she had been, how amazing she had been to help the other tributes and a load of other things that made her sick. When the time to watch her highlights in the game came she bit the inside of her cheek hard enough to taste blood. She looked at the front row and saw Finnick Odair she felt a stab in her gut seeing him knowing it was her fault his tribute died, she then continued down the line to see Haymitch, she would keep eye contact with him he would once again be her rock. The highlights showed her during her reaping and her heart broke all over again at the sight of Gale screaming for her as she walked up the stairs of the stage, it showed her shaking hands with Toby. It flashed to her at the parade when she captured the attention of the people of the Capitol. It then showed the first interview with her singing and the people cheering, it showed her running when the games began and how she nearly died in the blood bath if it hadn’t been for Logan.

 _“_ _You alright there Twelve?"_ She heard him say with his smirk, one that she would never be able to forget. She dared to look at Finnick, his mentor and tried to silently tell him she was sorry before looking back at Haymitch. When it showed her helping Lux she felt acidic tears threatening to fall from her eyes. She looked quickly at Lux’s mentors they looked heartbroken, had they known her long? Or did they always look this broken? Watching herself kill Petra from District 2 made her nearly throw up but it was once again Haymitch who helped her keep it together by whispering she wasn’t alone. When Logan appeared on the screen having woken up she felt her heart break he wouldn’t live much longer after this moment neither would Lux. When the avalanche happened she saw poor Lux trying to keep up with them but she had watched in horror as the force field appeared before her tear filled eyes and the rush of snow claimed her as if she were nothing but a fallen leaf in its path.

 _“Oh god no! VEN!”_ She didn’t remember this moment as Toby tried desperately to save her from the mutt attacking her, she didn’t notice the tears in his eyes as he fought to save her life. Watching his death was too much, he was practically the victor at that moment but he sacrificed himself for _her_ he should have been the one sitting up in this damn chair not her. She wasn’t supposed to be here she was supposed to be dead!

“My, my, my, what a game! How did you feel at that moment when Toby sacrificed himself for you so you could be the glorious victor?” She wanted to tell him that was a stupid question, which in a way she accidently did.

“All due respect that’s a bunch of crap.” She realized too late what she had actually said but it didn’t even seem to faze Caesar. He just gave her a sympathetic smile and asked her to explain.

“Glorious victor that phrase…it’s stupid. Unless you actually participate in the games, watching is one thing but being an actual tribute…you don’t understand. It may seem like sunshine and daisies…but it’s not. I wish I had died instead of Toby. He should be the one sitting here not me. Knowing I’m the reason he is dead, why Lux, Logan and Petra…I am here and they aren’t. Why am I seen as worthy and they weren’t? I don’t think I’ll ever be truly me again, I’ll be haunted I’ll be disgusted with myself…yet I have to keep a mask on for the rest of my life. I don’t think anyone but the other victors will ever truly understand my pain. And even if by some miracle I found a way to block out the memories…I’d still have the cruel reminder because I lost my leg.” She finished the last bit of her speech in a whisper. The look Caesar gave her was full of pity she hated that look how dare, he pity her!

“Now I understand you are going to sing for us? President Snow informed me that you had worked on a song for us. Who here wants to hear it?!” Caesar said expertly changing the topic she had to give him props he knew how to work the crowds. She however hated how he told the people he would sing again, if it hadn’t been for Snow’s threat she would have told him to fuck himself she no longer wanted to be the delicate little flower for Capitol.

“I suppose.” She said with a frustrated sigh the crowd cheered not even noticing how pissed she truly was. Not noticing how badly she wanted to throw things at them, smack them, and curse them.

“WONDERFUL! Ladies and Gentlemen…I present to you for another beautiful song MS. LAVENDER HARTLEY!” She fought back a glare when he called her Lavender, she hated going by that name but she supposed that Lavender would be her Capitol self and Ven would be her normal self it was better that way to separate the two now. She was handed a microphone and slowly stood up her real leg cracked from having been in the same position for too long and her prosthetic leg made a click as it locked into a standing position. She slowly made her way to the center of the stage with a sigh as she held the microphone up to her lips she wasn’t sure what she would even sing. She looked in the front row and saw all the victors, the stars of the Capitol and thought of one song.

“ _Lately, I've been, I've been losing sleep_  
_Dreaming about the things that we could be_  
 _But baby, I've been, I've been praying hard,_  
 _Said, no more counting dollars_  
 _We'll be counting stars, yeah we'll be counting stars_  
  
_I see this life like a swinging vine_  
 _Swing my heart across the line_  
 _And my face is flashing signs_  
 _Seek it out and you shall find_  
 _Old, but I'm not that old_  
 _Young, but I'm not that bold_  
 _I don't think the world is sold_  
 _I'm just doing what we're told_  
 _I feel something so right_  
 _Doing the wrong thing_  
 _I feel something so wrong_  
 _Doing the right thing_  
 _I couldn’t lie, couldn’t lie, couldn’t lie_  
 _Everything that kills me makes me feel alive_  
  
_Lately, I've been, I've been losing sleep_  
 _Dreaming about the things that we could be_  
 _But baby, I've been, I've been praying hard,_  
 _Said, no more counting dollars_  
 _We'll be counting stars_  
  
  
_Lately, I've been, I've been losing sleep_  
 _Dreaming about the things that we could be_  
 _But baby, I've been, I've been praying hard,_  
 _Said, no more counting dollars_  
 _We'll be, we'll be counting stars_  
  
_I feel the love and I feel it burn_  
 _Down this river, every turn_  
 _Hope is a four-letter word_  
 _Make that money, watch it burn_  
 _Old, but I'm not that old_  
 _Young, but I'm not that bold_  
 _I don't think the world is sold_  
 _I'm just doing what we're told_  
 _I feel something so wrong_  
 _Doing the right thing_  
 _I couldn’t lie, couldn’t lie, couldn’t lie_  
 _Everything that drowns me makes me wanna fly_  
  
_Lately, I've been, I've been losing sleep_  
 _Dreaming about the things that we could be_  
 _But baby, I've been, I've been praying hard,_  
 _Said, no more counting dollars_  
 _We'll be counting stars_  
  
_Lately, I've been, I've been losing sleep_  
 _Dreaming about the things that we could be_  
 _But baby, I've been, I've been praying hard,_  
 _Said, no more counting dollars_  
 _We'll be, we'll be counting stars_  
  
_Take that money_  
 _Watch it burn_  
 _Sink in the river_  
 _The lessons are learned_  
  
_Take that money_  
 _Watch it burn_  
 _Sink in the river_  
 _The lessons are learned_  
  
_Take that money_  
 _Watch it burn_  
 _Sink in the river_  
 _The lessons are learned_  
  
_Take that money_  
 _Watch it burn_  
 _Sink in the river_  
 _The lessons are learned_  
  
_Everything that kills me makes feel alive_  
  
_Lately, I've been, I've been losing sleep_  
 _Dreaming about the things that we could be_  
 _But baby, I've been, I've been praying hard,_  
 _Said, no more counting dollars_  
 _We'll be counting stars_  
  
_Lately, I've been, I've been losing sleep_  
 _Dreaming about the things that we could be_  
 _But baby, I've been, I've been praying hard,_  
 _Said, no more counting dollars_  
 _We'll be, we'll be, counting stars_  
  
_Take that money_  
 _Watch it burn_  
 _Sink in the river_  
 _The lessons are learned_  
  
_Take that money_  
 _Watch it burn_  
 _Sink in the river_  
 _The lessons are learned_  
  
_Take that money_  
 _Watch it burn_  
 _Sink in the river_  
 _The lessons are learned_  
  
_Take that money_  
 _Watch it burn_  
 _Sink in the river_  
 _The lessons are learned_ ” When she finished singing she didn’t wait to hear what Caesar had to say she handed the microphone and turned to leave, he seemed a little surprise that she left but played it off as if that was the plan all along.

“Ladies and gentlemen, your beloved victor!” He said with a large grin the crowd cheered and applauded but she just stormed backstage furious that she had to do that _again_. Haymitch had somehow beat her backstage and instantly wrapped his arms around her in a comforting hug.

The award ceremony was only a few hours after her interview she wanted nothing more than to go home but she wasn’t allowed to leave until the following morning. She stood in front of the people of Capitol as she was given a crown a symbol of both her victory and a life of servitude to Capitol. Whoever wore the crown was signing off all rights to a normal and peaceful life for a life of horror and lies. She was certain her cynicism was reasonable after what she had been through.

“Congratulations Ms. Hartley. I’ll be seeing you in a few months. But do remember our little talk, I’ll be keeping an eye on you dear.” President Snow said with his fake smile one that made her skin crawl and made her sick. He placed the silver crown with wings on each side and an oval stone of onyx and she just simply stared ahead ignoring the man completely. After all she was seen as a victor and victors never show weakness they were killers born and bred for the games isn’t that what the Capitol saw them as?

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This seemed like a good place to stop. However before you say it's horrible I know. I hate it myself, but the next chapter should hopefully be a bit better...and it will open up to what I had planned all along. See I don't care much about her games, I care more about her time as a mentor and her relationship with Haymitch. These past six chapters are more filler for what I really wanted to write about but I still felt they were needed to understand the character better and her relationship in it's earliest stages with Haymitch.
> 
> OH! And I do not own the song she sings (Counting Stars) it belongs to One Republic. To hear what I think she would sound like look up Jannel Garcia's cover of the song on YouTube.


	7. The Beginning of Something New

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just so you know this story is rated MATURE and from this point on it may not be just because of language if you get what I mean. So if it is not your thing, then sweetheart you have come to the wrong author for that IS my cup of tea.

She found the alcoholic drink was actually rather pleasant of course once you got past the burning sensation and allowed it to slowly dull your mind. She watched the amber liquid spin in the glass as she swirled the cup around in her hand not bothering to take another sip quite yet. The liquid was fascinating how it could erase the worst memories and dull any pain or fears you had in a matter of a few sips. She now understood why Haymitch drank as much as he did it was leaving her feeling numb so what if she woke up with a massive hangover tomorrow she could just drink the pain away again.

“Easy there sweetheart. That’s your third glass.” She looked up to see Haymitch and gave him a lopsided grin. She found it sweet how even though she had made it out of the games he was still looking out for her.

“Fourth, you missed the first glass I had this morning before you woke up. I couldn’t sleep so…here I am.” She slurred he frowned at her as he poured himself a glass. She watched him with a curious glance she was fascinated by how graceful he could be when he didn’t even try. And she loved how when he poured his drink his tongue stuck out just a little in concentration.

“Excuse me?” He asked with a raised eyebrow she blinked in confusion before realizing she had said her thoughts aloud much to her embarrassment.

“Forget I said anything…” She muttered as she went to stand only her prosthetic leg hadn’t properly locked and she stumbled towards the floor, only to be caught before she hit the floor by Haymitch. He always seemed to catch her right before she fell. She looked into his eyes and blushed even in her tipsy state she couldn’t help being embarrassed around him. How could she not be embarrassed around him when he was so together and she was…well she was her clumsy self.

“I’m not so together, I’m a drunk and you know it Ven.” He whispered, at least it sounded like a whisper to her everything was kind of fuzzy. She realized she once again spoke her thoughts aloud she had to stop doing that around him. “You probably should stop doing that sweetheart.” She cursed herself for once again not realizing she was speaking aloud. Her eyes quickly darted to his lips then to his eyes for once she was silent. Yet he seemed to get the hint and shook his head.

“Why?” She asked if she had been sober she would have smacked herself for asking him that but she wasn’t she had four drinks in her system and she wanted answers. He gently sat her down on the chair she had been sitting in with a sigh.

“I’m too old for you sweetheart. I’m thirty-five, and too broken for you.” She glared at him before shoving him away angrily.

“You act as if I’m twelve I’m _eighteen_ damn it. And it’s only seventeen years of a difference y’know. And too broken? Then what the fuck am I? Look at me! I am a monster, a _murderer_ and a one legged freak! Who could ever love me? Everyone my own age thinks I’m a monster and want nothing to do with me! They blame me for Toby’s death and they are right!” She screamed standing up quickly ignoring the head rush, she just wanted to get far away from him she was beyond pissed. Before she could leave the room he grabbed her arm and pulled her close with a glare.

“First of all sweetheart every damn victor has someone’s death on their hands so don’t act as if you are alone. And second of all you are _not_ a freak! Jeez woman you…you…ugh!” Instead of finishing his sentence he grabbed her cheeks and pulled her close for a kiss. She let out a squeak of surprise before grabbing onto his shoulders to pull him closer. She had only been kissed once in her life when she was fourteen by a boy her age who died a year later in the games, and it was nothing compared to this. She let out a moan when his tongue brushed against her lips and gladly let him in. He surprised her with his strength as he picked her up and shoved her against the wall pinning her against it as her legs wrapped around his waist. She was thankful that she drank at his place instead of her own where her Nana could have walked in on them at this very moment. She began to claw at his shirt desperately trying to get it off she had to, getting the hint he pulled away from the kiss to look at her before muttering under his breath.

“Shit, Ven stop. We can’t…” He said trying to pull away but she growled at him and pulled him by his shirt and kissed his jaw brushing her nose against his stubble making him moan.

“Yes we can.” She whispered in his ear enjoying how he shuddered in delight as her warm breath had brushed against his ear. She continued to pull at his shirt trying to get it off but he wouldn’t budge.

“You will regret this in the morning sweetheart. You’re drunk, I won’t take advantage of you when you’re drunk sweetheart.” He whispered huskily, she shook her head at him as she kissed his lips once, twice and a third time before gently nibbling on his bottom lip.

“I won’t, and so what if I’m a little tipsy? Doesn’t change anything. I wanted this sober too. Damn it I’ve wanted you since that day on the train when we talked. I didn’t realize until the parade how much…” She brushed her fingers through his blonde locks with a smile watching him as he closed his eyes with a sigh.

“Talk to me in the morning sweetheart. When you are sober…if you still want…” She gave him a pout and tried to change his mind but he was just as stubborn as her if not more. 

“Can I at least stay here? I can’t go home drunk, Nana would ring my neck.” She said with a lopsided grin which made him laugh and shake his head. He carried her to his room and laid her on the bed gently before pulling her boots off. He was careful with her prosthetic leg but when his hand brush against it she shrank back hesitantly, she didn’t like anyone looking at it yet alone touching it. But the look on his face she saw that in his eyes she was still beautiful. “Where are you going?” She asked when he turned to leave he looked over his shoulder with a small smile.

“The couch. Don’t worry I’ll be fine I’ve slept on that old thing numerous times. It’s rather comfortable actually. She sat up with a frown and shook her head. “Where else would I sleep sweetheart?” He asked with a laugh.

“Gee I don’t know maybe your bed? It’s big enough for both of us. I promise I’ll keep my hands to myself.” He must have been tired because he just sighed and sat on the bed and pulled off his shirt and threw it in the corner before grabbing an old shirt from the dresser and handing it to her.

“It’s more comfortable than what you’ve got on. Bathroom is over there.” He said as he pointed to the bathroom. She got up and grabbed the shirt he handed her and went to change. The shirt reached just above her knees which meant her prosthetic leg would show, she seriously hated the damn thing and felt more insecure than ever with it. But she was tired and there was a comfy bed waiting for her. When she stepped out of the bathroom Haymitch looked up at her with a smile out of respect he never once looked down at her leg or lack thereof, it was a simple gesture that made her adore the man even more. After getting into the bed she covered her legs and carefully took off her prosthetic and slid it under the bed. She made sure he didn’t see it, even if he said it didn’t bother him it bothered her.

\--

Ven woke with a groan, her head was pounding and she was ready to hurl. Perhaps drinking wasn’t the best thing after all. She let out a groan as she rubbed her forehead in pain she would have to find another way to numb the pain. Her hand reached out to where Haymitch had slept but realized he wasn’t there she sat up and looked around the room but found no trace of him, the bathroom door was open and the light was off meaning he wasn’t there. She reached under the bed and grabbed her prosthetic and quickly put it on just as she was about to get up Haymitch opened the door. He came in with a plate of breakfast and a hot cup of tea. Haymitch never ceased to amaze her.

“This will help with the hangover trust me.” He said with a smile as he gave her breakfast in bed, she never had such a luxury before. The breakfast and tea were amazing she always had loved eggs for breakfast and now as a victor she was able to even have bacon something that was too expensive when she was just a girl from the Seam.

“Wow the hangover really is gone. You were right.” She whispered more to herself than Haymitch who grinned.

“Of course I’m right.” He said as he took the empty plates and placed them on the dresser. She watched his every move with curiosity even if he said he was old and broken he was still rather attractive. Even if his blonde locks were uncombed and his shirt only half tucked in it was very Haymitch which was comforting.

“I didn’t have any nightmares last night for the first time since before the games.” She told him as he lazily threw himself onto the bed face first into the pillows causing her to bounce a bit on her side of the bed. His childlike actions made her laugh she rather enjoyed this side of him where he didn’t have to worry about getting her out of the games.

“Same…even when I drink I still get nightmares…but last night…there was nothing.” He muttered into the pillows before turning his head to look at her with a lopsided grin. His blue eyes had a mischievous sparkle that she had never seen in person before, the same sparkle that he once had before his own games. Perhaps he just needed an actual peaceful and dreamless sleep to be his old self. She moved so she was lying next to him and smiled softly as she brushed his hair out of his face. Very slowly she leaned close enough to kiss his lips as if to test the waters, to see if he truly meant what he said last night about waiting until she was actually sober.  He tried to pull back at first but judging by the _fuck it_ under his breath he changed his mind. He was the one who deepened the kiss as he rolled them over so she was underneath his arms that were surprisingly muscular for someone who lived a sedentary lifestyle. She let out a soft moan as his hand slid down her sensitive side and grabbed her hip pulling her close. Her eyes grew wide when she felt him against her, it drove her mad and she wanted more. She wrapped her arms around his neck and grabbed at his shirt, before dragging them to the front and beginning to fumble with the buttons. He chuckled against her lips before moving to kiss down her chin and her neck playfully nibbling on spots she had no idea, were sensitive. 

“H-Haymitch….” She said with a moan as his hand slowly slid under the shirt and caressed the bare skin underneath he was going to drive her mad! Once more he rolled them over but this time she was on top of him and he slowly pulled from the kiss making her whimper in disapproval which quickly stopped when he began lazily unbuttoning the shirt she wore with a playful smile. Each inch of skin that was exposed he kissed and playfully nipped at making her gasp and moan. When he finally had the shirt completely unbuttoned she realized she wasn’t wearing a bra and suddenly felt self-conscious and moved to cover but he grabbed her wrists and held them from her chest and slowly kissed her ample breasts. She let out a squeak as she felt his tongue draw lazy circles around the sensitive rosy buds of her breasts his tongue was driving her mad, she fought against his hold and he let go of her wrists immediately she laced her fingers into his blonde locks and desperately tried to pull him closer.

“Oh…gods….Haymitch…” She couldn’t form words at the feelings he gave her, her body was in sensory overload yet she wanted more. When he pulled away he slowly pulled the shirt off of her and threw it to some random corner of the room and flipped them over so she was on her back. With stumbling fingers he removed his own shirt and threw it to join the one she had been wearing before wrapping his now bare, arms around her trailing his hands across every inch of bare skin he could find. Her slender fingers slowly trailed up his chest and grabbed his shoulders as she brought her legs up, she felt awkward with her prosthetic leg and slowly pulled back.

“W-what? Second thoughts sweetheart?” He asked breathlessly she looked down at her leg and he realized what she was wordlessly saying and gave her what could only be described as a loving smile.  “You know that doesn’t bother me sweetheart. I didn’t exactly fall in love with your legs you know.” He slid his hands down her thighs making her shudder in delight. When he got to her knees he looked up at her with a mischievous grin and threw her legs over his shoulders, she furrowed her eyes in confusion but soon gasped as she felt him drag the black lace panties she wore down and nuzzle against her core. She jumped in surprise at the feeling and found she wanted more. He quickly moved her legs off his shoulders long enough to fully remove the panties before throwing them aside and resuming the previous position with a chuckle as she squirmed in anticipation. When his lips met her core she screamed it was a feeling she was unfamiliar with yet it was more pleasurable than she thought it would be. Slowly his tongue slid into her wet core making her squirm the only way she could explain the action in her head was it felt as if he were making love to her with that damn tongue. His stubble brushed against her thighs with each thrust of his positively _sinful_ tongue, the slight burn felt _amazing_ on her sensitive skin. Within a matter of a few short minutes she felt her release build but and desperately grabbed his blonde locks trying to pull him closer, she let out a scream as her back arched as she found release, she saw stars behind her eyes as he continued his motions until she was completely down from her high. Her frantic eyes looked into his blue eyes which had darkened with lust as she pulled him back up to eye level. Her legs slid down from his shoulders and rested on his hips yet her prosthetic made it slightly uncomfortable. She looked down at it once more and sighed, she wanted to remove it but didn’t know how he would handle that. He said it didn’t bother him but that was without him seeing it without her prosthetic.

“If it’s bothering you sweetheart just remove it. I don’t care about the damn thing. I care about you.” He said as he kissed her lips gently. She hesitantly pulled away to reach for her leg to remove it, watching him to see his reaction he sat up and kissed her shoulders before reaching his hands around her to rest on her own. Gently caressing her hands before grabbing her waist and pulling her close so her back rested against his bare chest. His right hand slid down to her warm core and brushed against the sensitive nub making her gasp. She quickly removed the leg and put it on the floor before leaning back fully to rest against his shoulder as he continued his motions and kissing her neck. Once again she felt her release and couldn’t hold back the screams of pleasure when it came. He kissed her jaw and with his left hand he caressed her breasts intensifying the high she felt. She looked up into his eyes and smiled this man made her feel love she never thought she would feel since the moment her name had been called. She saw him wipe his fingers on the sheets and noticed a bit of blood and was surprised she hadn’t felt him break her barrier, she always heard it would be painful yet she had felt no pain.

“I promised you I would always take care of you.” He whispered as he laid her down on the bed and hovered over her as he kissed her. She looked down and saw he was still wearing his pants and frowned it hardly seemed fair that he still wore clothes when hers had been discarded a while ago. As if reading her mind he chuckled and stood long enough to remove them and the briefs he wore. Her eyes went wide at the sight of him, she couldn’t help but wonder if he would be too much for her. As if he could read her mind he smiled and brushed her cheek lovingly. She refused to have second thoughts, she had fallen in love with this man, sure it was fast but when you could die at any moment you realize that you couldn’t take anything for granted. She sat up and grabbed his arms pulling him close so he stood between her legs and wrapped her one good leg around his somewhat slender hips pulling him close to her with a shy smile.

“Before you say anything I want this Haymitch, I want _you_.” He gave her a genuine smile as he lifted her chin and kissed her lips. She felt as if she were made of glass with how gentle he was with her, while she loved how he was gentle she wanted to let him know she wasn’t, she was a survivor a haunted one yes but she was still a survivor. He whispered how beautiful she was to him in her ear as he kissed her jaw slowly lifting her so she laid more on the bed and crawled on top of her with a smile, she was rather glad the beds in the Victor’s Village were so large even if they laid on the bed horizontally they still had plenty of room. She bit her lip in anticipation as he slowly slid into her, she let out a small gasp as her walls molded to fit him, she felt a little uncomfortable but she also felt as if he was meant to be with her. When he was fully inside of her she let out a moan, he had hit a spot in her that she never knew existed before and gods did it feel amazing she saw stars as clichéd as it sounded. His eyes fluttered close as he enjoyed how she felt around him and he never wanted to leave. Having become rather impatient she thrust her hips up into his with what she could only describe as a purr of satisfaction. His own hips began a gentle pace as he thrust into her warm core. The two lovers found a comfortable yet pleasurable pace. She felt another climax building and couldn’t even remember what number it was but gods she wanted it. She let out a scream as she climaxed he followed her after a few more thrusts, he continued his lazy thrusts as they both came down from their highs. As he rolled off of her he pulled her close so she rested on his chest desperately trying to catch her breath and steady her rapid heartbeat.

“You are amazing my little hummingbird…” She looked up at him with a curious look and he smiled lazily at her. “Just so you know I called you that _before_ that damn Flickerman. You will always be my hummingbird.” She chuckled as she sat up just enough to kiss his stubble covered cheek.

“And here I don’t have a nickname for you, you gave me two and I don’t even have one for you. Damn, I guess I’ll have to think of one.” He smiled at her as he brushed her hair out of her face and simply held her close before they drifted into a comfortable and dreamless sleep.

\--

The day of her Victory Tour had arrived and she was to travel from District 11 and so on until she reached District 1 followed by the Capitol. She hated the idea of having to even go on a tour in the first place she just wanted to go back to her old life of being a simple nobody. She had distanced herself from people of her previous life including her Nana, who in a way accepted that she had to learn to accommodate to the return home after what she had been through. Gale however didn’t understand why she had distanced herself from him, it wasn’t that she wanted to but she was terrified to be in the same room as the boy. He could never truly understand what she had been through, how she would never be the Ven he knew and adored.

She found that the tour seemed to go by as if she had never gotten off the train in the first place, she couldn’t even remember what she said or did while in each district. That was until she reached District 4, she was terrified to arrive at the District of her brief ally and friend. She didn’t know the girl or how she had been killed in the games but she could still remember Logan’s death and his screams were among the ones that haunted her.

“Ven? You need to get changed so I can do your hair and makeup.” Ven looked over her shoulder to see Nova who was giving her a sympathetic look a look she was sick of seeing from the woman and her prep team. Hell she had even been given sympathetic looks from Olympia which was like a knife to the gut. She slowly walked to the bed where the dress she was to wear was resting, it was a strapless corseted top, mermaid style dress it was a very subtle ombre of blues and a small bit of white. The heels she was given to wear looked like silver fish which if she had seen them before the games she would have found them rather interesting, yet now Ven could care less. She didn’t want to have to see Logan’s family standing under the hologram of his face. As she made her way out of her room she saw Nova waiting for her with a headband made of seashells. The second Nova placed it on her head she walked off to get the day over with. She looked for Haymitch who was waiting by the stage entrance and he gave her a half smile when he saw her.

“You look amazing sweetheart, though I prefer you _without_ anything.” He said the last bit in her ear, his voice a husky whisper making her shiver just a little. “You’ve got this. Just keep doing what you did for the previous districts.” She gave him a hug as she walked out onto the stage and saw the people of District 4. When she saw Logan’s face on the hologram she bit back the urge to cry. Beneath his face was his parents and his two younger siblings, they would never see him again, never hear his laughter or his voice. She heard Olympia whisper her name to get her to speak up and start her speech. She looked down at the notecards she had been given and decided they were too impersonal, she had been previously too impersonal for the other tributes and decided Logan deserved something a bit personal.

“While I did not know your female tribute personally, I did know Logan. From day one…after the parade he tried to get my attention. He attempted to charm me, but I turned him down. Which just made him more determined. It honestly annoyed me how he was always smirking at me and going out of his way to annoy me. But honestly, I don’t think I’ll ever forget him. In fact I can’t ever forget his face, for you don’t forget the face of someone who saved your life. If it wasn’t for him, I would have been another nameless bloodbath. When the Career Pack abandoned him, instead of killing him I helped him. I felt I owed him, but I realized that was just who he was. Logan wasn’t a killer, it may have come off as natural, but I could see in his eyes he was a protector. He hated seeing people get hurt, and would go to any length to protect them. I hope that one day he…you all can forgive me for not having saved him. For not doing everything humanly possible to get him home to you all…that I can at least live life in a way he would have liked, by not taking every little moment for granted. For being able to smile even when I feel as if I could never do so again. Because, _happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light_. And I feel as if Logan knew this, that he surrounded himself with people who were his light…” She bit her lip realizing she had been rambling and was beginning to sound ridiculous. But she saw his mother give her a tearful smile and whisper a silent _thank you._ After finishing her speech she made her way of the stage her tears finally falling the second she was out of sight. While Ven was crying into Haymitch’s shoulder two of the Victors came over to them. Mags and Finnick both smiled at Ven thanking her for her speech about Logan.

“I didn’t want him to die. I’m sorry…I’m so sorry…” She said with a whisper as Mags told her she understood and that she didn’t blame her. The woman reminded her of her Nana and when she hugged her she realized how much she missed her own grandmother.

-=-

The Victory Tour had come and gone and the time came for her to be once again presented to the Capitol, she was told that she would once again have to sing or suffer the consequences.  She didn’t want to sing, she hated singing but the lives of her friends and Nana depended on it. To make matters worse President Snow had _requested_ a song for her to sing. He requested a song called, _for everything a reason_ it was a song she hadn’t heard of before but it was what President Snow wanted her to sing so she had to learn it while on the Victory Tour. She had also been practicing walking in heels she still wobbled a little since she had a disadvantage with only having one leg. The dress Nova had designed for her was floor length silk-crepe with concealed snap fastenings at the halter neck top. There were sheer tulle inserts right below her bra line that showed off her tattoo and geometric silk satin-twill appliqués. The skirt was a combination of a gathered silk-chiffon draping at the sides with a semi-sheer skirt, split at side over top of it. It was a beautiful dress, but it wasn’t something she wanted to wear and the tall black and gold platform stilettos just made it even more _un-her_. Her hair was styled to be half up and half down to show off the gold [Filigree ](http://www.polyvore.com/tahari_marrakesh_open_filigree_drop/thing?context_id=117924738&context_type=collection&id=62328075)earrings. On her left wrist was a stack of gold and black bangles which jingled with ever move driving her insane but it was what the Capitol wanted so she had no choice. She did however like the makeup it was a more natural look, it was a smoky eye and a pink gloss for her lips with her nails left with a simple clear coat of polish.

The walk towards President Snow’s over the top mansion, which had a tacky projection of bright colored patterns, seemed to take forever. Olympia was however enjoying the attention she was receiving in her pink feathered monstrosity of a dress. The woman was dyed pink and everything about her was pastel pink even her eyes which she put contacts in. Haymitch on the other hand looked rather handsome, and _normal_ in a black tux. She was just glad that he was also escorting her to the party, he knew how much she did not want to be there and was even willing to remain sober just for her which made her smile.

“Oh dearie Nova has out done herself! You look just like a Capitol worthy beauty!” Gushed Olympia as she walked in here heelless feathered shoes, which confused Ven as to how she was able to even walk in the damn things. She tended to ignore Olympia for she really didn’t understand how horrible it actually was to be there at the damn party. To be a Victor of the Hunger Games, she understood how they had been brought up in completely different worlds, but still how could someone be so naïve to think that slaughtering children was entertaining? At least the ancient gladiators were adults!

“Just keep ignoring her sweetheart, it’s what I’ve done for _years_.” Haymitch said as he snuck a kiss on her cheek as they walked up the stairs and into President Snow’s mansion. She was in awe of all the food on the tables, it was enough to feed her district at least _a hundred_ times over! People were dancing around and enjoying themselves as she sighed with boredom. The music here was much too slow, in District 12 they had faster paced music that she used to love spinning around to. She remembered during one of the parties after the reaping she had taken Gale who was only nine at the time he had been a rather good dancer yet they had more fun spinning around and bumping into people as they laughed. She remembered they had knocked into a little boy from the Market, the baker’s youngest son, the poor boy who was only seven fell down and had begun to cry. She felt bad and after cleaning up his scrapped knee she danced with him too. But dancing in the Capitol was slow, boring and she couldn’t help but wish they at least found a faster paced song. It was when they changed to a song from her district that she smiled. It was an old song called _I Want Crazy_. It was fast paced and her kind of music, she squealed in excitement as she dragged Haymitch to the dance floor. The two began spinning around and enjoying the music, the people of Capitol however seemed confused at their dance steps, it was something they weren’t used to.

“ _But I don't want good and I don't want good enough. I want can't sleep can't breathe without your love. Front porch and one more kiss, it doesn’t make sense to anybody else. Who cares if your all I think about I've searched the world and I know now, it ain't bad if you ain't lost your mind. Yeah I don't want easy, I want crazy, Are you with me baby, Lets be crazy. Yeah!_ ” She sang as they spun around, a few people brave enough moved to the dance floor to her left she saw Finnick Odair and Mags laughing as they danced together, it seemed that dancing in District 4 was similar to District 12 because they were able to match their steps. Nova was on her right with Augustus who was laughing so hard he had tears in his eyes. It was _fun_ it was finally _familiar_.

“You’re welcome sweetheart.” Haymitch whispered in her ear, she realized that he had requested the song to be played just for her and felt her heart swell. The night only got more entertaining as more familiar songs played, her favorites and she soon found herself dancing and having a surprisingly good time. The next song that came on she began to once again sing along, this was the only time she was alright with singing, because it was for fun not for entertaining the people around her.

“This one is one of my favorites.” Came a velvety voice in her ear, she realized it belonged to Finnick Odair who had a flirty personality while in public but she learned that in reality he was far more laid back and a close friend to Haymitch. She decided to ignore the labels Panem gave them and just have fun so she began to dance with him which he thanked her for considering a fairly plump and neon orange woman had been eyeing him hungrily.  

“I know how to keep them at bay, can you sing?” She asked with a friendly smile, when he told her he could somewhat sing the two began to sing along to the music, it was a song called _Love Me Harder_ and was actually rather catchy. He spun her around with a laugh as she stumbled just a little in her heels but she didn’t care, she was having fun and Capitol could kiss her ass for all she cared.

“ _Cause if you want to keep me. You gotta, gotta, gotta, gotta, got to love me harder. And if you really need me. You gotta, gotta, gotta, gotta, got to love me harder, Baby love me harder, Ooo love me, love me, love me. Ooo harder, harder, harder_ ” She sang as he spun her around laughing the other guests began to watch in amazement as the two sang along without a care in the world for that moment they only cared about having fun. She found that Finnick was actually a great dancer and had to hold back her laugh as she realized that some of the Capitol women and a few men were glaring at her with jealousy as he held her hips and moved her hips in an obvious provocative motion.

“As much as I hate them, watching them get mad or jealous still cracks me up. I mean how can I take someone who looks like a giant angry bird seriously? Look at the woman in the neon green, how many muttation birds do you think she killed for that _hideous_ outfit?” He whispered in her ear, this time she couldn’t help but laugh he was right it was rather entertaining to watch them react in such ways. “By the way, take care of him. He deserves some happiness for a change and you make him happy. I haven’t seen him smile, I mean genuinely smile in a while.” She knew he was talking about Haymitch and knowing that people actually supported them was refreshing, most people in her own district would just judge them they would tell her she was too young for him, he was a drunk, that she could find someone better. Yet at the same time they would whisper things about her behind her back. A few times she had heard people whisper things like _monster_ and even _murderer_ , she may act like she didn’t care what people thought but really she did peoples words stung they each felt like a knife stabbing her they made her think perhaps she never really left the arena. Which in a way was true, she left a part of herself in the arena and just moved on to a new arena one where she had to continue to charm Panem to stay alive and to keep her loved ones alive as well. Throughout the night she found herself dancing with not only Haymitch and Finnick but with Nova for some faster paced songs and a few songs with Augustus who had grown on her, she loved how he would make fun of the other people from Capitol and even tell her a few scandals.  Which were rather strange to her, like how one woman had been caught cheating on her husband with a stylist from District 1, and it just so happened the stylist was another woman who was married to a Gamemaker’s nephew who had gotten a nose job to have a nose similar to a previous year’s victor only something went wrong so instead his nose looked like what Augustus called a pug nose. But some of the scandals were rather funny like how a man who lost his money due to gambling had been dyed bubble gum pink by his furious wife. And apparently the dye was rather permeant and even after countless washing and months of embarrassment was still pretty bright. She had a feeling that Augustus might have had a hand in that judging by the wink he gave her and the sly smile that made his cat eyes glimmer with mischief.

When the time came for her to sing the actual song President Snow requested she had to fight back a groan. She was tired, she had after all been on her feet all night and had eaten enough food to feed at least three or four families in her district. She was about to go into what Nova called a food coma. After singing the song and giving a quick bow she tried to make her exit but President Snow had other plans. The man had asked her to dance and she couldn’t exactly turn him down not without serious consequences. A strong scent of roses invaded her personal space to the point where she had to fight back the urge to gag, it was obviously too strong to be a natural rose it was quite obvious it was genetically altered. But why exactly he would want such an enhanced smelling rose was beyond her. Didn’t make his eyes water like it did hers?

“Your stylist did a wonderful job this evening Ms. Hartley.” He said in a voice that was sickly sweet. She couldn’t form words at this moment what did he want her to even say? She had to practically walk on egg shells with him to not only protect herself but her friends and family as well.

“Thank you President Snow.” She said after a moment she figured she could keep her response simple and to the point. It seemed her although simple response, was enough to please him.

“You seem rather close to Mr. Odair, I hope it won’t interfere with his business affairs.” He said in a threatening tone. Ven having learned that Finnick as well as a few other victors were forced to sell themselves to the people of Capitol and couldn’t help but be disgusted that they were forced to do so.

“We are strictly friends. We will _never_ be anything but.” She said shortly, she didn’t like what he was not only hinting at but how he was so casual about what he forced Finnick to do. He didn’t quite seem satisfied with her response but gave a curt nod. When the song ended he allowed her to excuse herself from the dance floor and his presence. She quickly made her way towards the exit and practically sprinted outside to get some fresh air. She bit back a sob as she clutched her stomach and gasped for air. Not only had the enhanced rose smell bothered her but the fact that she was nothing more than a helpless animal in the den of a blood thirsty beast. He knew she was terrified, he knew that she would break if he pressed the right buttons. And he knew exactly which buttons to press for not only her but every victor.

“Lovely isn’t he?” She let out a yelp as she spun around to see who had snuck up on her only to trip on her dress and fall back into the balcony banister. “Easy there kid. I’m a friend of Haymitch.” She recognized the man, it was Chaff he was a tall man of about six foot and he had a scar on one of his dark cheeks. She also noticed he like her had lost a limb from his time in the Arena.

“Do you ever get used to the smell?” She asked, he seemed to know she was talking about the genetically enhanced rose President Snow wore and laughed in a laugh that made it seem as if it could compete with the cannon fire.

“No. In fact over time it gets even more difficult to deal with, many victors hate the smell of roses because of it.” He said as he took a sip of his drink. Ven had begun to realize that her previous views of the victors was far from the real them. She never really thought about the horrors that they continued to live with, the dangers that they had to live with even though they survived the games.


	8. I'm Not The Only One

Ven sat in her arm chair looking outside the window, for what had to of been the hundredth time since she came home Gale was standing in her yard. The poor boy didn’t understand why she was avoiding him but she didn’t want him to see her so broken, and so changed.

“Just let the kid in Sweetheart. He has a right to an explanation. Even if it is sugar coated.” She looked over her shoulder to glare at Haymitch, he had been trying to get her to at least acknowledge the boy.

“Didn’t you tell me it was best to just forget those who wouldn’t understand?” She spat as she once again looked out the window. Haymitch sighed as he walked out of the room she heard him go quietly down the stairs and judging from his footsteps he was going to the front door. She wanted to scream at him but figured it would be pointless for he wouldn’t listen to her. The sound of the front door opening made her fight the urge to start crying, she hated being so damn emotional but because she had yet to actually talk about her experiences in the arena she couldn’t help it.

“Ven? Are you mad at me? Do you hate me or something?” The soft voice of Gale made her want to cry even more, he thought she hated him, that he did something.

“No.” She couldn’t form anything but that single word, it was as if she was mute and that was what bothered her the most since coming home she just couldn’t talk about what she went through in the arena.

“Then why won’t you talk to me? Why do you keep ignoring me? I need _someone_ to listen to me!” When the small boy began to cry she felt worse than ever. She acted as if he never knew loss, when in reality the boy knew all about stolen innocence. He was forced to grow up much too quickly since the death of his father last month. It had been another horrible cave in, in the mines. A good portion of the miners had died including Gale’s father. His mother was left with three young children and another on the way and here Ven acted as if she was the only one who had ever lost anyone. She couldn’t hold back the tears this time she couldn’t fight back the sob that left her lips either. The sound was more like a wounded animal than human to her ears but despite the horrifying sound the small boy simply stood up from his seat and wrapped her in his little arms. The fact that the boy was willing to comfort her even after she ignored his very existence made her cry harder, maybe he did understand the pain she felt.

“I…I…I…I’m…s-sorry.” She managed to cry out in between sobs, the small boy just hugged her tighter as he let out his own tears. In that moment she found herself telling the boy every fear she had, how she was too scared to sleep without a light on or without someone near her. How she couldn’t sleep without a knife under her pillow. How she was terrified that if she let him back into her life she would lose him like everyone else.

“Why do bad things happen to good people Ven?” He asked in a voice that sounded too broken for the little boy she knew, it broke her heart that he ever had to feel any pain. She looked up into his eyes and wiped her own tears away. She never wanted him to suffer, she never wanted to worry about him either.

“Because the world is cruel. I won’t sugar coat it Gale. Promise me you won’t put your name in there anymore than needed. I will help your family, just don’t put your name in the reaping bowl more than needed. I swear I will do everything in my power to protect you.” She said as she wiped his tears away. After spilling her heart to the boy she felt as if a weight had been lifted, she could finally breathe easy. She was still scared but she felt slightly better, that she could continue to live that she wasn’t truly alone.

-=-

The day had finally come, it was reaping day. She stood in front of her mirror staring at the outfit Nova picked out for her. She still put together outfits for her. Nova told her while she was the most desired stylist of the season she still wanted to make outfits for her she saw Ven as a friend and she told her she loved making custom outfits for her that she could deny the people of the Capitol.  Today she wore black leather leggings with black heels and a black top with orange spots, the outfit was completed with a black long sleeve open draped blazer. It was simple but still fashionable enough to please the people of Capitol. She hated that this year she would have to mentor two tributes who most likely would die in the games, chances were they would be a bloodbath.

Ven made her way to the stage and took her seat next to Haymitch who was borderline drunk again, normally she would tell him to remain sober but today she didn’t say a word. She only wished that she were slightly drunk herself but she only remained sober because she wanted to make sure that she at least knew the names of the two she was to mentor. She wanted to make sure that Gale wasn’t called she had to make sure that he was safe. She had for months insured that his family had some extra food. She taught Gale how to make snares, a trick she had learned from observing Logan during training the previous year, it was a useful skill and it resulted in Gale being able to catch some food to feed his family. The boy had even mastered using a bow with a bow that she had received as a gift from a man in Capitol, why someone gave her a bow she had no idea but at least someone had a use for it. She sat quietly as the Capitol video played she didn’t pay attention to it having heard the same one every year before. After the video Olympia gave an excited squeal as she announced that it was time for the reaping to begin. Her large heels clicked and clacked on the stage as she reached her bubble gum pink talon like nails into the bowl full of the girls.

“OUR LUCKY FEMALE TRIBUTE IS CHARITY BENSON!” A small girl made her way towards the stage, she was a Seam girl and she was only twelve. The poor girl who must have looked ill to begin with, looked as if she would collapse from fear. It was quite obvious that this girl wouldn’t survive, it would be a damn miracle if she made it past the bloodbath.

“Hello dearest! Come, come don’t be shy!” Olympia said as the small girl made her way up the stairs shaking. Ven couldn’t help but wish someone would volunteer for the girl. But no one ever volunteered in this district, they weren’t stupid. Being a tribute from District 12 was a death sentence. In all seventy years of the games there had only been _three_ victors and that included herself. So when you were reaped everyone knew it was goodbye.

“NOW FOR THE GENTLEMEN!” Olympia said with a grin as she pulled out a name, Ven wondered if this tribute would at least be older. “VINCENT BLAKE!” The crowds parted as a boy of sixteen made his way to the stage, this boy was another Seam kid. Although he was sixteen he looked as if he could pass as one of the twelve year olds. Ven heard Haymitch grunt in displeasure as the boy made his way up the stairs. Under his breath she could hear him mutter bloodbath. It may have been cruel but it was most likely true.

After Olympia introduced the two tributes she dismissed the crowds with the same _happy Hunger Games and may the odds be ever in your favor_ as she said every year. Standing up Ven made her way inside the Justice Building with a tired sigh. She hadn’t even left yet and she was ready to go home. She didn’t want to think about the damn games, she didn’t want to think about her obligated return to the Capitol.

-=-

Ven opted to not ride in the car with the tributes, the less time she spent the less attached she got. It wasn’t something a mentor should do, avoid their tributes but she knew the odds were _not_ in their favor. The muffin basket on the table became the most important thing to her at that moment she grabbed a chocolate chip muffin and began to pick at the top and nibble on the pieces she picked off. Haymitch was in the bathroom so she was the only one in the food car when the two tributes boarded. She eyed the girl who had obviously been crying. Her face was red, and was blotchy even a bit swollen. Meaning the girl lacked the survival skills she could tell by the way the girl was too scared to do anything but cry. The ones who spent more time crying were the ones who died first it was just a fact. The boy looked as if he tried to be brave but his eyes told a different story, he looked like he would jump out of his skin at the slightest movement.

“Hello.” The girl said quietly as she sat across from Ven. She studied the girl more trying to think of what they would have her portray her as to get sponsors. She could always do the naïve twelve year old but she wanted to do more than that. That card had been played so many damn times that she felt even the people of Capitol could pick up on it. Ven refused to say a word to the girl but simply gave her a quick nod as Haymitch walked into the room with a drunken stumble. He ignored the girl as well as he put ice into his glass and poured some of the liquor he had into it. He offered a glass to Ven but since the first time she drank she couldn’t stomach it so she waved a hand signaling a no thank you.

“Do you have advice on how we should approach the games?” The boy asked as he reached for a lemon and poppy seed muffin. The girl had already grabbed a plate full of eggs and bacon and was practically inhaling it.

“Don’t get killed. That’s always a good one. Right Haymitch?” Ven said in a monotone voice, a voice that was so unlike her normally she was a lively and passionate person but now she could care less. She just wanted to crawl into bed and never leave. The tributes looked shocked that she was so blunt, but they had to learn this was not going to be easy. They had to learn that the chances of survival were slim, they could be dead in only a few short weeks.

“Look, I won’t sugar coat it. Haymitch didn’t for me and I won’t for you. The chances of survival are slim. It was a miracle that I made it past the bloodbath. Then again I was smart enough to run instead of fight. If you fight, you raise your odds of dying. You _aren’t_ one of the careers you haven’t been trained for this. You _don’t_ have a skill with a useful weapon like an axe, trident or even a pickaxe because you are too young for even that in our district. I will tell you this, get the people of Capitol to love you. If you can make yourselves seem irreplaceable then they will want to sponsor you. Sponsorship will help keep you alive just a little longer. But it is really up to you, if you are smart and have a strong sense of survival you will stand a chance or at least have a better chance.” She said as she grabbed cup of tea and took a sip. At this point Haymitch had brushed his hand along her shoulder and wordlessly motioned towards the sleeping cabins as he made his way towards his room. She waited a few minutes in silence before standing and making her way towards his cabin. The tributes ate in silence it appeared that her words had sunk in.

“Start thinking of how you want to portray yourselves. Run your ideas by each other and when you meet your stylist run it by them. Remember if you are loved you get the sponsors.” She said once more before leaving them alone. She didn’t even bother to knock on Haymitch’s door and just walked in. He was sitting on the bed with a drink in his hand and a bottle in the other. He looked up at her as she took the bottle and placed it on the nightstand with a sigh.

“It never gets any easier sweetheart.” He slurred taking one last gulp of his drink before she took that too and placed it next to the crystal bottle. She slid his already unbuttoned vest off his shoulders and laid it on the back of the velvet chair in the room and kneeled on the bed behind him before massaging his shoulders. “I hate how they expect _me_ to keep them alive. I can barely keep myself…” He began to whisper at this point as he tried to fight back the tears.

“You aren’t alone this time. I’m here Haymitch.” She whispered in his ear as she kissed his cheek. He grabbed her hands that rested on his shoulders and pulled them so her arms wrapped around him in a hug. "You hear me? You aren’t alone anymore. I’m here…I’ll always be here for you now. Just like you are for me.” He looked up at her with unshed tears in his eyes and gave her a grateful smile. She couldn’t help but smile back at him as she kissed his nose. She adored this man and loved how he wasn’t afraid to show his own weakness in front of her. The fact that he showed her his own weakness made her feel better, it made her realize it was normal to be scared to feel helpless.

“I love you sweetheart.” He said as he pulled her into his arms.

-=-

Ven slowly opened her eyes and took in her surroundings she realized she was on the train and that she wasn’t alone. She and Haymitch had fallen asleep in each other’s arms and she noticed that he had changed her clothes for her like he often did if she fell asleep before him. She noticed that he had also tucked her prosthetic leg under the bed like she normally did before he wrapped her in a warm and fuzzy blanket. The two had fallen into a routine and she rather enjoyed it. It was familiar and comfortable.

“Morning sweetheart, how’d you sleep?” He asked with a yawn before brushing her hair out of her face. She laughed when she saw his own hair was a mess like it was every time she woke up next to him.

“Same as always when you’re here. Dreamless, and you know if you want to keep your hair long you should consider braiding it before bed to prevent this…disaster.” She said jokingly as she brushed her fingers through the mess. With a playful and dramatic huff he turned on his side pulling her with him making her squeal before she covered her mouth to prevent everyone from hearing.

“Relax sweetheart these walls are soundproof. Olympia complained how I kept her up with my screams. And so these walls are now soundproof.” She shook her head as she stood up slowly and pulled her prosthetic back on and found her clothes from the previous day. She kept his shirt on and tied it at her stomach so it looked as if she planned to wear it all along. She would change out of her heels and grab the red leather flats that were in her closet before getting off the train, she didn’t feel like wearing heels any more than she had to.

“That may be but we have to get ready. We have two tributes to think about now.” She said with a yawn.

Ven realized that this time getting off the train she wasn’t the center of their attention, sure there were a few who wanted to get a glimpse of the previous year’s victor but they were fascinated by the two new tributes. People seemed to adore the awestruck look Charity had as she looked around the extravagant Capitol. They loved the way Vincent didn’t even pay attention to them, they said he was the strong silent type. She gave a quick nod to Nova who was quietly observing the new tributes trying to come up with an idea for what their chariot outfits would be. She never realized that while they would have a design the stylists would have to work quickly to make it the correct size before the parade. She looked around the train station and noticed the tributes from District 6 had arrived the two victors were obviously addicted to morphling judging by their appearance and the somewhat erratic movements they made. She could only imagine what it would have been like if she didn’t have Haymitch for support. She wondered if she would have turned to morphling if she didn’t have him.

“Well, well, well, what a look we have going. I actually kind of like the lover’s shirt with the leather leggings. It’s casual yet it keeps them wondering, is it _your_ shirt or _someone else’s_?” Ven turned to see Gus who this year had streaks of a navy blue in his spiked hair. Giving him a questioning look she asked why he wasn’t prepping one of her tributes.

“Nova asked me to prep you, we have a new girl working on your tribute. Fausta, she is an eager little thing, honestly I doubt she will last long she gets on Nova’s nerves. If you get on Nova Brighton’s nerves then you _must_ be annoying. Now let’s go get you ready.” He said as he casually rested his arm around her shoulders. Over the time of her victory tour she grew closer to the man, he was like a brother she never got the chance to have. He made things easier to deal with, with his somewhat twisted sense of humor but it was what made him well him and she wouldn’t change it for the world.

Gus had given her a clean pair of leather leggings telling her it worked for her and gave her a white pleated halter. He had decided on giving her a long sleeve open drape blazer that was a beautiful turquoise blue color that made her dark hair stand out and gave her some color to her pale skin. And for once she didn’t complain about wearing heels they were more of a wedge but comfortable. It was kind of funny to her that before she had been reaped she never could walk in heels now after a few short months she was nearly a natural. Of course she still had moments where she was her usual clumsy self but besides those she was a natural.

“How’ve you been since the tour?” She asked Gus he gave her a coy smile as he began to tell her the latest gossip and told her about the guy he had been seeing. Apparently he had met a guy at a party a few weeks ago and hit it off rather well. With a laugh she made her way towards the chariots to see her two tributes. Nova’s work never ceased to amaze her as her young female tribute was in a gown that looked like it was made of diamonds. She sparkled and her long brunette seam locks were styled in tight ringlets with a few stray rhinestones strategically placed to draw the eyes of sponsors. Vincent was dressed as if he wore coal, on his suit was what looked like diamonds. On his shoulder was a large diamond cluster that looked ready to mine. She wondered what the big jaw dropper would be this year and as if reading her mind Nova gave her a grin.

“This little string here when pulled will make more diamonds and gems appear. I wanted to do something with fire but I haven’t exactly mastered that yet without potential burns. A friend of mine is trying to work out the kinks on that one. If anyone can do that it would be Cinna. I’ll tell you this, the moment he gets fire to work without harming the tributes I’m letting him take my place as stylist!” She said as she helped Charity into the chariot. She slowly made her way up the stairs to the balcony for the victors and was amazed by the view. It was so different up here than being down with the chariots. From here she could see everything, and she had a great view of her tributes. Nova had done a great job making her tributes noticeable some of the other district tributes seemed to be plain and as if they were just blending in with their surroundings.

“Very different view from up here huh?” Finnick said as he leaned on the railing next to her. She smiled at her friend before looking down to see what his tributes looked like this time. She noticed that once again the stylist chose to make the tributes a mermaid and merman again.

“Mer-people again? It seems that your stylists are just reusing previous years’ outfits. Same for District 7, they are trees again.” She said with a bored sigh.

“Yep, they aren’t very original. We can’t all have a stylist like your district it seems. But hey at least my tributes have actual clothes on. Poor District 1 has only feathers and rhinestones again. They look like muttations.” He said with a laugh, Ven found herself laughing along with him.

“Excuse me Ms. Hartley. I was wondering if I could sponsor your male tribute. He is divine! I _must_ sponsor him!” A man who was covered in orange scales said, Ven was taken aback by his appearance she was amazed someone would want to have _scales._ She noticed out of the corner of her eye that Finnick flinched a bit as she nodded to the man accepting his offer to sponsor Vincent. She realized what this man wanted, he wanted Vincent. When the man left she let out a sigh.

“Is it wrong for me to wish that Vincent doesn’t live long enough to repay that man?” She asked more to herself than anyone it was a victor from District 1 that answered. She hadn’t seen the woman approach her but Cashmere was standing next to her.

“No, I find myself wishing that for my tributes more than I should. Either that or for them to end up disfigured or to be undesirable.” Ven never spoke to Cashmere but she found that the footage she had seen of her over the years did no justice. “I’m Cashmere, we haven’t been introduced yet.” She said offering a perfectly manicured hand to Ven with a smile. To her the smile seemed almost forced as if it were more of a mask than an actual smile. However having been raised with manners she offered her hand to the woman and gave her a smile.

-=-

“Have you decided how to present yourself in the interview?” Ven asked as she dodged the punch Vincent threw, she was helping him by giving private training sessions. If a victor wanted to they could reserve a time slot for private training sessions and Ven felt it would be best to do just that. She quickly spun around her male tribute and managed to pin him to the ground. She sighed before standing wiping her hands on the grey capris sweat pants she wore and fixing her light grey and white work out jacket.

“Again, Vincent if I can pin you then we have a problem. You have me at a disadvantage, you have both your legs. I have only one. Now once again have you come up with an idea of how to portray yourself?” She asked as she helped him off the mat.

“I don’t know. I’m not much of a people person. But I know I have to stand out from the others. Meaning I can’t do what everyone else is doing.” He said thoughtfully, it was then she realized maybe his best card would be to play the quiet yet calculating person. She wanted him to have a chance but she knew if you came off as too good the Career Pack could see you as a threat.

“Alright, use your quietness to your advantage. It can still make you interesting. It will drive them crazy how they can’t get into your head. Which is when you will take the time to observe your surroundings. Make note of _everyone_ and _everything_. It’s the observations that keep you alive.” She said as she led him to the weapons training. She had taught herself how to use many of the weapons after the games which to some sounded odd but she wanted to know to help her tributes. She was rather good with the bow since Gale had been working with her on that skill. But she noticed Vincent’s build wasn’t made for a bow, he had more of a build for a spear or something close to it. Grabbing a trident she tested the weight of the weapon and looked at Vincent deciding it would be a perfect choice.

After a few hours of training he was able to use a trident, he wasn’t anywhere close to Finnick or how Logan had been but it was good enough. He had spent time with swords, spears and physical combat. She wanted him to stand a chance and this was how he would do so, to learn a bit of everything so he could be prepared.

The time for the private sessions with the Gamemakers had come and gone. Ven was nervous to see what her tributes would get for a score. Her nerves made her start to pace back and forth she kept rubbing her hands on her grey leggings as her black flats made scuffing noises on the tiled floor she continued to pace. Her nails were bitten down to painful bloody nothings as she continued to bite them out of nervousness. She couldn’t understand why everyone else was so calm, or why she was more concerned about their scores than her own the year before. She quickly looked at Haymitch who was slumped in his seat on the leather couch looking bored out of his mind. He looked up at her and grabbed the hem of her maroon long sleeved shirt and pulled her next to him with a sigh.

“Relax sweetheart, they will do fine.” He said calmly she looked at him as she continued to bite her nails, well more her cuticles at this point which was making her fingers hurt even more. Nova was glaring at her out of the corner of her kohl lined eyes, she hated Ven’s new habit of biting her nails until they bled. Haymitch grabbed Ven’s hand and held it to prevent her from doing any more damage as they finally called Vincent’s name.

“And the male tribute of District 12, Vincent Blake…a score of NINE! A very good score! Now for the female tribute Charity Benson, a score of…SEVEN! Well folks that is the scores for this year’s tributes I’ll see you later for the much anticipated interviews!”

-=-

Interviews arrived and despite not being one of the interviewees she found out she still had to dress up, she may not be on the actual stage but she was still in the spotlight as a victor. Thankfully though she could wear something longer, she had been afraid to sit in the dress she wore during her interviews with how short it had been. This time around she wore an off white pencil skirt that cut just below her knees so the prosthetic leg was still somewhat hidden, the top portion she wore was a black cotton bustier with a black leather peplum zip belt which looked like it was part of the bustier. As for shoes she still had to wear heels this time around but they weren’t anywhere near as tall as the ones she wore the year before, and this time they were little black suede ankle booties with a slouchy cuff. Nova had her hair and makeup minimalistic a natural smoky eye and nude lips with her brunette hair straightened so it reached just above her elbows, she painted her nails with a nude polish and gave her only one piece of jewelry to wear a black and gold tone geometric shapes necklace. It was much simpler this time around and Ven found she liked this look a lot more than when she was a tribute. She noticed that simple was what Nova went for this time around for the tributes too. She worked off their natural beauty instead of over glamming them like the other districts. Vincent wore a simple grey button up shirt with a black tie and black pants. And the doe eyed Charity wore a black dress with a rhinestone belt and a grey button-less cardigan. The girl looked like the innocent child she was, but she also looked sophisticated and drew attention to herself without having to try hard. That was enough to get the people to like her she was sure Charity would be able to get sponsors.

She noticed that the female tribute from District 4 while being one of the older tributes she still had a naivety about her she noticed Finnick seemed somewhat worried when watching the girl’s interview. It was almost out of character how he was acting he had his arm crossed and one of his thumbs’ nail between his pearly white teeth. He wasn’t quite biting the nail but she felt as if he were about to any second.

“Friend of yours?” She asked as she causally rested her head on his stiff shoulder. He looked down at her and shook his head.

“No. But I just worry. I don’t exactly want to lose her, but at the same time I don’t want her to have the Victor’s life. It’s hard when you get attractive tributes because you know what they will have to do if they win.” His wisdom filled words were brief but had a point. Ven knew if she hadn’t lost her leg she would still have been one of the desirable victors, meaning a life of being a Capitol whore. She gave him an understanding smile and told him she understood. While telling him this her fists clenched she discovered that being back in Capitol left her with a whirlwind of emotions. She wanted to cry she wanted to hit someone but seeing the faces of Victors she befriended brought a smile to her face it was confusing and honestly it gave her a migraine.

When it was time for Charity to be interviewed she watched the girl like a hawk. She watched how the girl seemed to shake with a bundle of fear and nervousness. But she still managed to plaster a convincing smile on her face which made Ven smile as she sat a little straighter as she pushed her shoulders back.

“Charity, what a beautiful name! Now do you have any siblings? Anyone you have waiting for you to go home to?” Caesar asked as he tilted his head in curiosity at the small girl sitting across from him.

“Yes Mr. Flickerman, I have two younger sisters, Temperance or Tempe as everyone calls her and Hope and of course my Mom. And my Aunt Judy and my three cousins; Henry, William and Sadie.” She said without hesitation, the girl while she may have been beyond terrified put on a brave face and awed the audience to the point where she could probably get them to literally eat out of the palms of her hands.

“Such manners! Now what do you do for fun back home? Do you have any hobbies?” He asked obviously trying to calm the twelve year old which she seemed to appreciate.

“Well Mr. Flickerman…” He interrupted her and told her she could just call him Caesar. It was obvious the girl had charmed _him_ which meant she most likely charmed many in the audience. “Of course, Caesar, well I like to dance. I often dance with my little sisters our Mom taught us how to dance since she loves to dance too.” Caesar smiled at the girl and politely asked her if she could show the audience which made the girl giggle as she shook her head making her brunette locks shake.

“Oh please? I would love to see you dance.” Caesar tried to coax her into a mini performance but she just smiled.

“I’ll make you a promise. If I make it out of the arena I will show you. Which means, you nice people will have to help me a little. I promise if you all sponsor me and I survive I will show you.” Despite being only twelve Charity was brilliant and her life in the Seam actually worked to her advantage. Living in the Seam made her smart, not many people took the time to realize while they may not be well fed or as strong as other tributes the kids from the Seam were smart. They knew how to survive with very little it was a fact that many over looked. Which is how when one tribute like Haymitch or Ven won it surprised people. It made her proud to be from the Seam, to be able to show Panem that they were more than some malnourished child.  And it seemed that Charity knew that she could work this to her advantage, to prove she was worthy of sponsors to give them something they wanted but to still have the situation in her control.

“Twelve year old my ass, more like a thirty year old in the body of a twelve year old.” Haymitch said with a laugh which made Ven and Nova chuckle.

“Well now I wish I could sponsor tributes! Who here is now anxious to sponsor the lovely Charity Benson?” Many in the audience jumped up and began to scream that they wanted to sponsor the girl which seemed to surprise some of the other Victors perhaps Charity out right telling people to sponsor her was a brilliant move, it made them wonder if their future tributes should do the same. When her interview ended she shook Caesar’s hand and thanked him and the audience for allowing her to be there and gave a curtsy to the audience who roared with excitement. She had done it, she had charmed the hell out of the people of Capitol. Ven quickly made her way back stage and caught the girl in her arms as she began to sob. The poor girl’s body was shaking as she desperately grabbed onto Ven who was as close to a mother as she could get while there. The girl had a green tint to her usually pale face, knowing exactly what was happening she carefully led the girl to the restroom and sat her down. She pulled the girl’s hair from her face as she became sick. Rubbing her hand on the girl’s back soothingly she remained silent a moment.

“Just let it out. I’m here for you. Whatever you need I’ll do my best to help.” She said as she grabbed some toilet paper and wiped the girl’s mouth and flushed before wrapping her in her own arms as she soothed her like her mother used to do for her when she was a child. She could hear Vincent’s interview on the holo-screen in the bathroom. But for that moment she didn’t care how the interview went. If she wanted to know how it went she would catch the rerun they always had or just ask Haymitch. She found herself singing a song that her mother used to sing to her when she was scared and only her mother’s voice could calm her.

Time went by too quickly, she needed more time. But the fates wouldn’t give her more time. She watched in utter agony as Charity stepped into the elevator alone. She was going into the arena where Ven wouldn’t be able to protect her from harm. She could only send gifts from the sponsors but she couldn’t physically help the girl. That thought made her want to scream in frustration. Ven now understood what made Haymitch refuse to get attached to tributes. It was what made him, wish to be completely drunk instead of doing much to help. What exactly do you tell someone before you send them to their potential premature death? _Break a leg_ that didn’t seem quite appropriate. Charity began to whimper as the elevator rose into the arena.

 

The arena was relatively flat compared to the previous year. There wasn’t much however there was a large dam which Ven had a feeling could lead to a problem. But she had to focus on her tributes. She was seated at the monitor that had a live image of her tributes, Haymitch sat next to her resting his head on his palm and struggling to stay awake he hadn’t been able to sleep the night before. In fact even when in each other’s arms they were restless.

With the ringing of the gong the tributes were off. She saw Charity run towards the trees but Vincent had attempted to grab a bag. That had been his downfall, he hadn’t seen the boy from District 2 come barreling towards him with a machete raised. The boy had swung it like a bat and instantly severed Vincent’s head. Ven let out a scream as she shot out of her chair causing it to crash to the floor. She was about to be sick, Haymitch slowly stood and wrapped his arm around her shoulder as he slowly led her from the viewing room. She began to tremble when she heard the cheer from one of the many District 2 victors.

“Easy there sweetheart, you saw it coming. One of them was bound to be a bloodbath.” Haymitch said soothingly as he wiped her tears away. They had to keep their relationship secret so she couldn’t hold him as close as she wanted at that moment. With a sniffle she began to slowly calm down. She still had Charity to think about. The girl needed her, she had to keep her alive as long as she could.

Two days, it had been two days’ time would not slow down. If anything it seemed to speed up to the point where at any second it would come to a tragic and violent crash. Charity was still alive, she had been smart and used her knowledge of which wild berries were safe. The girl’s life in the Seam had helped her survive with little food. Maybe she could outlast the others and win? Or was that too much of a long shot? Ven constantly found herself in front of the monitor watching the girl as she continued to bite her already bloody nails even shorter. She had been chewing on them for so long that the pain didn’t even phase her. The only time she ate was when Haymitch, Finnick or Mags brought her food. She refused to leave, what if something happened? What if Charity was hurt? And needed, her or Haymitch to send her something? She hated this constant state of worry what Ven really wanted to know was how the fuck other victors could do this! And to think Gloss from District 1 had to watch his sister Cashmere in the arena, she couldn’t bear to watch a stranger yet alone someone she cared for deeply. What if it was Gale that got reaped?

“Ven, come on you need a break. Come with me to get something to eat.” Mags said as she gently pulled Ven from her seat. She tried to resist but Mags was actually pretty strong for a woman in her seventies.

“No, I have to keep…Charity might need…” Mags gave her a stern look she knew too well it was one her Nana gave her that silently told her to not argue with her.

“Haymitch will take over. Just like Finnick will take over for me. You aren’t the only mentor. Now come you need to eat something. Besides you aren’t any use to Charity if you don’t take care of yourself.” Mags said in a motherly voice. She slowly made her way out of the room with a tired sigh, maybe she was right maybe she should take a break. Haymitch gave her a weak smile as he sat down in the chair she had previously occupied.

Mags sat her down in a plush lounge chair and handed her a cup of steaming tea with a smile. She without hesitation took the cup and after blowing on it to cool it down just a little she took a sip. The tea helped her relax what she didn’t realize was the woman had slipped in a sleeping draught. Her already tired eyes began to feel heavy. In less than a minute she found herself drifting into a deep sleep.

When she woke she realized she wasn’t in the chair she had originally been seated in, instead she was in her room in the penthouse. She sat up and rubbed her eyes as she took in her surroundings. Asleep on the loveseat in her room she saw Finnick. He must have been the one to bring her to her room since Haymitch was watching the monitor to make sure that Charity was taken care of. Plus if it had been Haymitch he would have known she doesn’t like to sleep with her prosthetic leg. As she was getting out of the bed Finnick began to stir, she noticed that when he was sleeping he looked much younger, he looked peaceful which was surprising since he was a victor.

“Hey sleepyhead, you just getting up?” He asked as he stood and began to stretch when his shirt rose to show his well-toned stomach she blushed. He having noticed gave her a wink and struck a pose.

“I’m sorry do you find this distracting?” She rolled her eyes as she began to laugh while throwing a pillow at him and hitting him in the face.

“Who needs Finnick Odair when I have Haymitch Abernathy?” She said as she placed her hands on her hips. After pretending her words physically wounded him he laughed.

“Oh please, Haymitch is an old man! I am _the_ Finnick Odair!” Once again she rolled her eyes at her friend’s antics and made her way to the bathroom to splash some cold water on her face.

“Old? I prefer aged to perfection. He is not only mature but stronger than he looks.” Finnick mockingly made a face as they made their way back to the mentoring room. Haymitch gave her a smile as she stood behind him to look at the monitor.  She noticed that the Career Pack was still going strong, that was until one of them turned around and decapitated the male, she her Mags gasp and Finnick mutter under his breath. But it was the female tribute who had the most heartbreaking reaction. The girl let out a loud screech that sounded more animal than human before bolting towards the tree line. When she had managed to get far enough she collapsed under a tree. The very tree Charity was sitting in. The small girl called out to her in curiosity and concern.

“Are you alright? What happened?” She asked in her small voice. The female tribute looked up with another screech. “It’s okay, I won’t hurt you. I’m Charity what’s your name?” She asked with a friendly smile. The girl was doing a combination of just plain shaking and rocking herself with her arms wrapped around her as if she were hugging herself. Her eyes were wide and terrified yet they also were haunted by what she had just seen.

“A..A….n…” She couldn’t form the words, Ven fully understood that feeling. Charity tilted her head a moment as she tapped her index finger on her bottom lip in thought.

“Wait you are the girl from District 4! Um…Annie right? I tried to learn names. I love names. How each district has different names, it’s actually really interesting. The girl from District 1 her name is Diamond. See her name in say District 10 wouldn’t work. It would just seem strange. But to the luxury district it works just fine!” Her cheerfulness seemed to comfort _Annie_ as Ven learned her name was. Her terrified posture seemed to relax just a little.

Another two days, time had sped up again. Ven found it odd that when you were in the games it was never ending. But as a mentor time went much too quickly. Perhaps because you feel helpless? She wasn’t entirely sure but she knew she just wanted time to stop.

Today the Gamemakers weren’t satisfied with the lack of deaths. No one had died since the boy from District 4, which to Ven was perfectly fine she was tired of death anyway. But to satisfy their thirst for blood the Gamemakers broke the dam. She watched the spider web cracking and gasped. She had to warn Charity and now Annie who she made an alliance with. Running to the donation monitor she quickly scanned what to send. Deciding on the cheapest and simplest gift she sent a roll with a warning note.

**_Dam breaking. RUN. FIND HIGH GROUND.–V_ **

Hitting the priority sending button she began to do something she never did before, she prayed to whatever god still existed that it would reach them in time.

In the arena the parachute had landed a few feet from Annie who looked at it hesitantly before picking it up to open she noticed the roll but not the note. It was Charity who picked up the note. Her eyes grew at least two sizes as she looked towards the dam then up to the sky whispering a thank you. She grabbed Annie’s wrist who yelped in terror as Charity began to drag her.

“We have to go NOW! I hear something!” Annie’s eyes looked at her in utter confusion as she continued to allow herself to be dragged.

The sound of the dam breaking, it was a sound Ven would _never_ forget. It sounded like a beast roaring mixed with a storm. The two girls ran for high ground and desperately tried to find a tree. However at the speed of the wave trees could be heard ripping out of the ground.

“ANNIE! I CAN’T SWIM!” Ven knew at that moment Charity was a goner. The size of the wave…the speed…the strength…she would never survive. The room went silent except for Ven’s sobs as she hid her face in Haymitch’s shoulder. The other victors knew this was the end of the games. The question was would anyone even survive?

Haymitch later told her that when the wave came the force had snapped Charity’s neck, killing her instantly before she could even register it. All around the arena tributes died one right after the other some next to each other. But it was Annie from District 4 who survived. She was a strong swimmer, she had managed to swim to safety. And when they announced her name she let out a scream that made her sound like a wounded animal. It was a sound Ven would never be able to forget for a long time, if ever.


	9. Anything Could Happen

Accidents happen, that’s what President Snow had told her. And because she hadn’t listened she had to pay the price. She had come home from the games already depressed but she was nearly inconsolable when she found her Nana at the bottom of the stairs. Her already frail neck was twisted at an unnatural angle. The Peacekeepers said she had slipped and fell down the stairs. But Ven knew better, she had angered President Snow even after he warned her not to. Her Nana had obviously been there a few days judging by the horrible stench which made her stomach wrench. And that wasn’t even the last of the punishment. During the next reaping as another punishment for warning Charity about the dam breaking President Snow had rigged the reaping, that reaping it had been two Seam children. Both were only twelve and when placed in the arena they were in between Careers which resulted in them becoming bloodbaths.

Ven was sitting in the tub of her Victor’s mansion the water had long turned cold. But it made her feel alive for that moment. Hazelle who was dropping her laundry off had tried to get her to open the door for the past hour perhaps longer. As her body had gone numb her sense of time had all but vanished. She knew it was selfish but in that moment she wanted nothing more than to just end it there. Perhaps if she gave into her pain she could finally be free of the nightmare that had become her life. She slipped under the freezing water and felt the piercing cold stab at her lungs. Despite the cold of the water it felt as if her lungs were on fire. Yet as she began to give into the anguish she felt she pictured Haymitch, the thought of him being left to deal with everything _alone_ …the thought of him losing her after she swore she would _never_ leave him. She heard a muffled banging on the door and jumped. She sprung herself out of the water with a scream of disgust at what she had nearly done. It was at that moment Haymitch had busted the door down and grabbed her. He was a mix of terrified and angry and the glare he gave her was one she never wanted to see in his normally loving blue eyes.

“What the _hell_ were you thinking?! Damn it _Lavender_!” When he yelled at her and used her full name she began to sob even harder. She never imagined that by becoming a victor she would hate herself so much, that every moment she would wish to just end it. She began to feel the bitter cold of the water and felt herself shiver uncontrollably as she clutched onto Haymitch who was still screaming at her.

“I need help…I…oh gods I need help….” She said between her sobs as he pulled her out of the water and wrapped a towel around her holding her like a child. Hazelle was in the doorway crying, she made her cry which made her realize even more how bad it really was.

“You promised me you wouldn’t leave. Damn it woman don’t you _ever_ scare me like that again!” Haymitch cried as she looked up at him.

It had been about a month since her break down. She had gotten help since then, Nova had a friend who was what she called a therapist. It was strange to talk to a stranger but it helped a bit. Being able to talk to someone who didn’t judge her, someone who just listened. She had been keeping a journal of all thoughts and of any nightmares she had.

She had since moved out of her own home, unable to live in the house her Nana had been murdered. She had moved in with Haymitch, and the two had fallen into a routine that reminded her of her childhood. A time when her parents were alive. She would wake and go downstairs to make breakfast, he would come up behind her and kiss her cheek and whisper good morning in her ear. And on the mornings where she was the last to wake she would go down to him making breakfast and would hop up on the counter to watch him cook. Of course he often burnt the toast since he had yet to master making toast which was rather amusing. But today was a little different from every other morning. When she woke Haymitch had brought her breakfast in bed with a small vase with a small bouquet of forget-me-nots it was her favorite flower that grew wild in District 12. Her mother used to always have some in a vase in the window sill. She noticed the usual toast wasn’t toasted, in fact it was just two pieces of bread. Which was curious as to why he would bring bread he hadn’t toasted.

“Sweetheart…I was wondering how serious you were about…well us.” He said almost hesitantly it seemed uncharacteristic of him to be nervous around her. Normally Haymitch was very confident but lately he seemed more out of character which confused her.

“What? How serious…why are you…do you regret…are you about to break up whatever you want to call us?” Ven became very nervous herself, Haymitch never exactly called her his girlfriend and he never exactly said what they were. But she couldn’t help but wonder if he either regretted being with her or he was bored and wanted to find someone else. He had been her rock since the games and couldn’t imagine _not_ having him in her life as much as he had been lately.

“No! _No_ , it’s nothing like that sweetheart. It’s just…I was wondering…well…shit. I already screwed this up. Let me start over. Lavender Fiona Hartley, shit _no_. Damn it.” He seemed to want to say something but he kept messing up which made her laugh a bit when it finally sank in what he was trying to say, the untoasted bread he brought up, him asking how serious she was about them. It made perfect sense now.

“Haymitch…are you asking what, I think you are?” She asked tilting her head as she squinted when she noticed he grew more nervous she held back the urge to smirk before kissing him as she grabbed his stubble covered cheeks. “Yes. I will. But I just hope your vows are better than ‘ _oh shit_ ’ because those vows…well they would be terrible.” She said with a smile.

“So you would…want to?” It was at this point she burst into a fit of laughter and shook her head at the man who was acting like a nervous teenager. Something that seemed so out of character for him.

“Yes I will marry you.” His blue-grey eyes lit up as he jumped out of the bed and grabbed her and spun her around. She out of surprise let out a squeal and she frantically grabbed onto his shoulders. When he put her down he quickly kissed her before pulling her towards the fireplace in the bedroom. He pulled out a box of matches and tried to light a fire, he began to mutter angrily to himself when the fire wouldn’t light. She knelt down and grabbed the box from his hands with a smile. She lit a match and placed it in the fireplace on top of a crumpled piece of paper. She blew on the fire and put a few logs on as it slowly began to grow. Out of the corner of her eye she saw him grab the pieces of bread with a lopsided grin on his face. She slowly made her way towards him and sat next to him with a smile. He handed her a piece of bread with a smile she kept eye contact with him as they both placed their pieces in the fire, just long enough to toast them. While it wasn’t an official marriage on paper it was a symbolic one for them. From that moment on she was no longer Lavender Hartley, she was Lavender Abernathy. Wife of Haymitch, just a kid from the Seam who in turn became a victor and a mentor, who became her rock and she was a miner from the Seam who became his.

After they completed the ceremony he carried her to their bed and laid her down gently. He couldn’t stop smiling at her as he watched her. She bit her lip and held back a laugh as many times as they had been together each time she was still nervous, and every time he took care of her as if it were their first time.

“Come here.” She said pulling him towards her with a laugh as she kissed him soundly. In almost the blink of an eye their clothes were gone and they found their familiar pace as they made love. But this time she felt more complete than ever before, her life had become a cliché but she loved it and she loved him. When he had filled her completely and collapsed on her chest he looked up with a loving smile.

“I love you Mrs. Abernathy.” He said making her giggle as she brushed his sweaty locks from his face. She couldn’t believe she was married, if someone had told her she would marry Haymitch she would have laughed in their face. But now she couldn’t imagine ever being with anyone else. She pictured them in a world without the games with children running around never having to worry about a reaping. She imagined a little boy with her hair and Haymitch’s mischievous blue eyes. She imagined a little girl with blonde curls and sparkling eyes, with a smile that left her father wrapped around her little fingers. She imagined a dog, she always wanted a dog but with barely enough food to feed her family a dog was not a logical option.

“What are you thinking about sweetheart?” Haymitch asked as he shifted so his chin rested on her breast while his hands ghosted against her sensitive sides and found a resting place on her hips.

“The future, with no worries of reaping’s…with…a dog and…” She paused not knowing if he actually wanted children, it had never come up before. As if reading her mind he smiled.

“And children? One day…whether it be nine months from now or nine _years_ I will give you the family you want sweetheart. And I will do everything in my power to keep them from the games.” He said as he rolled onto his side to look at her a little better. His hands lazily caressed her stomach as if he were imagining it swollen with his child. But she had to wonder, was she even able to have children? They had been together on numerous occasions and she hadn’t bothered with the shots that the Capitol had and he hadn’t used anything either. She had always wanted a family, but she also didn’t want to have one out of fear of her children being reaped.

“Ven? You alright sweetheart?” Haymitch asked as he eyed her carefully. She shook her head as if the action would physically clear her head.

“I’m fine. Just thinking.” She said with a smile, but it didn’t quiet reach her eyes. Haymitch knew when something was bothering and he knew when she was lying so she wasn’t surprised when he called her out on it.

“Y’know my mother was told she couldn’t have children. She and my Dad tried for years before they finally had me. And against all odds they had my little brother a few years later. Did you know my mother was from the Merchant Square? She met my father when he came into her parent’s shop. Her father was the cobbler. It’s her hair that I got, I never really fit into the Seam with my hair, my eyes they however were a mix I have some grey and some blue. My brother was the opposite, he had the dark hair like my Dad and my mother’s blue eyes.” She smiled at him as he casually caressed her cheek as he spoke she had always wondered where his blonde hair came from.

“What was she like? I only remember a little bit about my mother she died when I was still really young. But I remember she would sing to me, it was from her that I learned how.” Ven said in almost a whisper she wished she could remember more about her mother but as time went by it seemed she almost forgot what she even looked like. If it hadn’t been for the one photograph she had of her she was sure she would have forgotten her face.

“She was a caring woman. She loved to collect flowers. And she always smelt like…like spring time. When I was really little she would make crowns out of dandelions and wear them on top of her long blonde hair which she always had in a braid. She was always smiling too.” He said with a sad smile as he remembered his mother. Hearing him talk about his mother made her realize how close he had been to her before she had been killed.  She wanted to have a close relationship with her family but often the fear of her own children being in the games terrified her. If Snow could kill her grandmother who’s to say he couldn’t do the same to her children if she didn’t do what he said?

“Ven, nothing will happen to our future children. I swear to you I will do everything to keep them safe.” Haymitch said as if he were reading her mind as if knew her insecurities and fears.

It was this moment she realized that he meant it, she knew he would never let harm come to anymore people he loved or cared about. She realized that she wanted nothing more than to grow old with him surrounded by children and grandchildren who never had to worry about the threat of the games. Who knew nothing but how loved they were. She couldn’t help but wonder if it was just a naïve dream or if it could become a reality one day.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to make up for the angst-y intro to this chapter. So I decided to have them get “married” in this chapter instead of the next one.


	10. Whispers of Rebellion

Ven’s alarm clock was ringing and instead of making her want to get up it just angered her. She had just managed to fall asleep and now she had to get up. With a groan she rolled onto her side and shoved her face into Haymitch’s shoulder.

“Make it shut up! I just fell asleep an hour ago.” She whined, she heard him grunt before grabbing the clock and throwing it she jumped when she heard a shatter. Once again he had managed to throw their damn alarm clock out of the window and shatter the window in the process.

“Damn it _Haymitch_! I just got that window fixed _yesterday_!” Ven said with a tired and irritated glare. Haymitch slowly sat up himself with a confused and exhausted look on his face.

“Why was the alarm set anyway?” The look she gave him told him everything, Reaping Day. Their least favorite day but unfortunately there was nothing they could do about it. Ven slowly made her way out of their bed and pulled on her prosthetic leg before walking to the closet and pulling out a sea foam green long sleeve dress with a flounce style skirt and corset seam detailing at the bodice and skirt. It was wide at the shoulder with the neckline trimmed in ribbing. She pulled on the dress and Haymitch gently pulled her hair to the side as he zipped up the back and gave her shoulder a gentle kiss. It was their normal morning routine, at least their routine if they even bothered to get out of bed. Often she would just walk around in one of his button up shirts and socks not even bothering to look nice and he never complained.

“I _hate_ Reaping Day.” He said as he wrapped his arms around her from behind. Her eyes went to her flat stomach and her eyes began to water, she had yet to get pregnant but on Reaping Day she felt as if each of the children were called it was as if her own child was called. Since Charity and Vincent she refused to get close to her tributes but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt each year when they were killed. As a mentor she always hoped for the best but expected the worst.

“Ven? Sweetheart don’t cry, you know I hate it when you cry.” Haymitch said with a sigh, she hated to cry just as much as he hated to see her cry so with a deep breath she wiped away her tears and put on her mask she wore for the people outside the walls of their home. She would be the brave victor without a care in the world, the strong woman who didn’t still cry herself to sleep at night, or the woman who had to sleep with a light on at night. To the outside world she was Lavender Hartley, victor of the 69th Hunger Games, the ever popular singer who was in high demand at the parties in the Capitol. But inside their own little world she was Ven Abernathy, wife to Haymitch Abernathy. They were two more broken victors and two mentors who had long since given up on a victorious tribute. They were two more victors that were forever haunted by their games that were scared to be alone, yet even more scared to announce they were and had been together for the past few years. They were the husband and wife who had desperately been trying to have children but had no luck, yet at the same time were grateful they wouldn’t have to fear their children being called to their deaths in the arena.

“Let’s get this over with. I just want to get it over with.” She said as she went to her dresser to pull out a pair of black tights and sat on the bed to pull them on. Haymitch finished getting dressed and handed her, her knee high black leather boots.

-=-

Even after all these years Ven hated the damn promotional video for the games, you’d think after seventy-four years they would have created a new video but it appeared to be the same damn one. Ven looked at the escort and frowned, she never thought she would miss Olympia but she did. Effie Trinket was even more bubbly than Olympia and seemed even more naïve and shallow in Ven’s opinion. And she often spoke ill of the Seam kids, having been one herself she was rather protective of them.

“Now, let us begin!” Effie said with a big smile which made Ven’s skin practically crawl. People from the Capitol had no idea how traumatizing the reaping really was, to them it was a source of entertainment not a death sentence.

“PRIMROSE EVERDEEN!” Ven was certain if she had been drinking something it would have been spit out, she knew that name. Prim was only twelve, and she was the little sister of Gale’s friend Katniss. She quickly looked at Gale who looked as if it had been his own sister reaped instead. As the small girl made her way towards the stage a brunette girl from the sixteen year olds section shoved her way towards her sister.

“PRIM! PRIM!” The Peacekeepers made their way towards the older girl ready to drag her away. “STOP! NO! I VOULENTEER! I VOULENTEER AS TRIBUTE!” She screamed making a few people shuffle nervously. Gale had moved to grab the younger girl who was screaming for her sister when her older sister made her way towards the stage. This was a prime example of how destructive the games were to families, it tore them apart. She felt Haymitch brush his hand against hers in comfort, normally he would never do such a thing but with everyone’s attention drawn to the sight before them they were safe to at least hold hands.

“What is your name dearie?” Effie asked with a bright smile, Ven looked at the girl with curiosity perhaps she had just enough fight in her to win. She volunteered for her sister, and she wanted nothing more than to get back to her sister. But it was all a game of chance, the odds of the Career Pack being top game were extremely high like every year before.

“Katniss Everdeen.” Something told Ven that name would forever be burned into her mind. More so that the past tributes. She remembered every tribute she ever had to mentor; Charity Benson, Vincent Blake, Poppy Evans, Joshua Eaton, Edith Smith, Henry Teller, Millie Winston, Theodore Jackson, Beatrice Rooney and Marcus Prior. Ten tributes she failed to save, ten _children_ who would never come home alive. Ten tributes who forever haunted her at every moment of her existence. She would be damned if she didn’t try her best to get Katniss out of the games alive. But when the male tribute was called her heart nearly broke, Peeta Mellark was the baker’s son and she adored the boy from afar. He was such a kind boy who couldn’t hurt a fly and now he would have to be in the games.

Ven since day one as a mentor never bothered to ride with the tributes to the station and this year was no different. So instead she made her way to the station with Haymitch. It was one of the only times the two could be together in District 12 without becoming the latest targets for the district gossip.

“Do you think she is the one?” Ven asked quietly, recently there had been hushed talks about a rebellion but it was a possibility that many victors and a few Capitol citizens spoke in hushed tones. Haymitch had been more determined to spark the rebellion since the two had married. With the chance of them actually conceiving a child came the risk of their child or children if they were lucky enough to have multiple children, being reaped was fairly high. He didn’t want to ever have to worry that his children could be reaped.

“Maybe, sadly I don’t see the boy getting very far.” He said with a sigh, he was used to tributes dying even if it never got any easier, he had grown to expect his tributes to die in the arena.

“I’ll miss his beautiful icing flowers. I used to just watch him decorate the cupcakes.” Every week she would buy two cupcakes, one for Haymitch and one for herself. She loved the bright colors the boy used they were inviting and pleasant in the dark and gloom mining district.

“But in a twisted way its best that his chances of survival are slim. At least they won’t make him like Finnick.” In a way Ven knew he was right, Peeta had features that people of Capitol desired without a doubt if he by some miracle survived he would be sold like Finnick and several other tributes. 

“Doesn’t make it any easier. Just promise me you won’t forget we have two tributes. Even if she is a fighter we still have to give him a chance he could surprise us.” She said with a sigh as she boarded the train. She made her way to her room and kicked off her heels before making her way to the dining car.

When the two tributes boarded she eyed them carefully, Peeta had tear stained cheeks and his eyes were still watery and Katniss had an angry look to her grey eyes but she could still see the fear buried deep in the stormy eyes. She was definitely a fighter, and she knew the girl could use a bow from what Gale often told her when he brought game he hunted.

When Haymitch made his way into the room she noticed his eyes were bloodshot meaning he had been crying again, he played it off by pretending he was drunk when in reality he hadn’t touched a drop a liquor since they first started their relationship. But by playing the drunk he managed to keep off of Capitol’s radar. Sure he bought white liquor from the Hob but he never drank it. He would give some to Chaff when they were in Capitol but usually he just poured it down the sink and left the empty bottles lying around the house to keep up the illusion. It was brilliant and it was proof that Haymitch was far from an idiot.

He gave her a brief wink which she smiled at from behind her hand. For years their tributes were clueless and even Effie had no idea they were together yet alone married. It was a game to them to see how long it took for friends to find out. Of course the only person who knew was Nova, she had made the mistake to walk in on them not realizing they were at least intimate. That had been a few months before they had gotten married. And when she told her best friend and former stylist that she was married to Haymitch the woman gave her a knowing smirk and whispered congrats. Augustus of course found out by keeping up his charade of being attracted to Ven. When finally Haymitch had growled at him to stop flirting with his wife. Augustus let out a bark of a laugh and told him he wasn’t a threat in the slightest unless his wife happened to turn into his current boyfriend or Finnick Odair overnight which became a joke between the four of them after Haymitch got over the shock.

Ven had begun to zone out when she heard a thud and causing her to jump. Looking up she saw a knife between Haymitch’s fingers, Katniss had a look that if it were possible for looks to kill Ven was pretty damn sure Haymitch would be dead at least ten times over. This girl was the perfect candidate for the rebellion, she was sure of it.

“Save that hatred for the arena. Trust me the angrier you are the easier it will be to do what you have to do.” Ven said a she looked casually at her black polished nails pretending to be bored. When she was really observing her tributes calculating how to use their every skill in the arena and if they managed to survive the games how to use them in the rebellion. She felt somewhat regretful that she had to use her tributes as pawns but it was time that the games come to an end once and for all, she had to think about her future children that is if she ever had any of her own. Besides she was sick of watching children die for crimes that had supposedly been committed decades before any of them were even born.

As she took a sip of the tea Haymitch put in front of her she watched Peeta, he had been relatively silent during the whole exchange which often was not a good sign. Silent tributes often meant they weren’t exactly fighters which meant odds of them being a bloodbath were higher. With a loud sigh she stood up and made her way to her cabin, she could already feel a migraine coming on.

Laying in her warm and fluffy bed she quietly counted to ten before she heard her door open and Haymitch slip into the cabin. He threw his vest onto a chair and slowly undid his shirt and belt before crawling into the bed next to her.

“Ven, sweetheart you need to relax a bit. I know it’s hard but you know stressing causes you to have migraines.” He whispered as he gently massaged her tense shoulders.

“I know, it’s just that I’m tired of watching tributes die. Even if one of them lives the other won’t. And what if they aren’t the ones we are looking for? Then what?” She said with a loud sigh as she dragged her trembling hands down her face.

-=-

As Ven stepped off the train she noticed that Peeta had already gained attention and practically had the people at the train station ready to eat out of the palms of his hands. Katniss however had a stonier look on her face which was not helping her. Slowly making her way to the brunette girl she whispered in her ear.

“Smile, you have to at least pretend to like them. I know it’s hard to pretend but if it helps you can picture them in your shoes right now, I know the thought of them panicking in the arena always helped me. Or picture Prim, safe at home with Gale watching over her.” Katniss seemed a bit surprised at her suggestion and the fact that she mentioned not only Prim by name but Gale as well. It seemed people often forgot how she was friends with the boy after all these years. Or that she was observant she was able to learn more than people thought because she could silently observe and learn about people. No matter where you were if you were quiet and kept your distance people tended to think that meant you were ignorant to your surroundings but in reality it was the opposite.

Just like Ven noticed that this year not only had Nova stepped down as lead stylist but Augustus hadn’t stepped up like he normally would have since he was the assistant stylist. This year it was a new unheard of stylist which peaked her interest thankfully Nova and Augustus made their way over to her to fill her in on who the new stylist was. He was a dark skinned man who like Nova didn’t go over the top with his appearance, the only Capitol fashion she really saw that stood out was his gold eye liner. It popped more on his complexion than some of the other people she had seen desperately try to make the liner work for them.

“Remember I told you about a friend of mine named Cinna? That’s him and like promised I stepped down because he found a way to get the flames to work without burning tributes. Wait until you see what he has in store for your tributes this year!” Ven smiled at her friend and laughed when she saw Augustus watching Peeta make his way to the makeover center.

“You might want to keep that one away from the people here, he is rather attractive and they would devour him. I know I would if I was single and he were ten years older.” He said with his bark of a laugh.

“Oh hush and leave him alone! I don’t want to hear that you scared more of my damn tributes Augustus!” She said as she playfully shoved her friend and made her way towards her own changing room. This year she was given a simpler outfit than previous years it was mostly greys and blacks but it was comfortable.

When she made her way towards the chariots she took note of each of the other tributes trying to determine who would be the biggest threat to her own tributes. As usual the boy from District 2 looked like a serious threat, the only other one that looked like a threat really was the boy from District 11. It seemed this year was another year of younger tributes, but she of course knew never to underestimate them. People had underestimated her and she had won her games. Out of reflex she found herself grabbing a bowl of the sugar cubes, she rather enjoyed the sweet taste and it calmed her nerves.

“ _More_ sugar cubes? If you aren’t careful your teeth will rot away. Can’t have the hummingbird’s teeth rot away!” Came the smooth yet sultry voice of Finnick, she couldn’t help but smile at the man as she threw a sugar cube at him and told him to hush as she offered him some, she had recently gotten him hooked on them.

“You better not take those damn sugar cubes away from her Fishboy. You know those are like morphling to her. And they tend to put her in a better mood, which means less of a headache for me.” Haymitch said with a laugh as he walked up to join them, his eyes never leaving Katinss or Peeta.

“Ven thinks she found a winner. The girl, she has a certain spark about her. Best keep an eye on her no? Not to mention work on her people skills, she is seriously lacking in those.” He continued as he casually wrapped an arm around Ven, as if to steady himself.

“We’ll have to see won’t we? Wouldn’t it be nice if it was a winner?” He asked with a laugh while giving her a discreet wink knowing she was hinting rebellion again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Five pages, I managed to write five pages in between the craziness of four upper level college courses. I hope you enjoy it and cut me some slack since I most likely won’t be able to update for a while since I don’t have much free time.


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